Page 4 of Sorrow

Spinning, I grab my light blue faded hoodie from the chair where all of my clothes go to die and head back out, this time to the kitchen. Boo bought bacon and eggs for the first time in weeks, and I’m craving a good scramble. I’m also hoping that fucker smells bacon and comes running like the animal he is so I can deny him.

Luckily for me, it works. I hear him in the bathroom washing up before I can evenplate the food, butunluckilyfor me, he walks out just as I serve my plate and grabs it before I can even turn off the stove. “This makes up for your rudeness. Thanks.”

He moves over to plop on the couch, not bothering to put his shirt on before he takes a bite and nearly breaks my heart. He might’ve if I had one.

My stomach growls and I look at the nearly empty carton of eggs. Boo will kill me if I eat the last of them, and I know better than to make more bacon. Hayes would just steal that, too.

Oatmeal it is... again.

I hold my head high as I boil the water in silence. I won’t let him get to me. I won’t.

The burp he releases when he finishes only antagonizes me further, making it hard not to stab him when he crowds me in the kitchen again to set his empty plate in the sink. “Oatmeal? You really made bacon for me and mush for yourself?”

“I didn’t make anything for you. You stole it,” I point out. “I let you have it. It must be so hard for you being one of the richest men in Cape Frost. You look absolutely emaciated.”

Rolling his eyes, Hayes crosses his arms and stares down at me. “Always so fuckingangry. I’m not rich, dumbass. I just work for a living. Maybe try it.” He pulls out his wallet and tosses a $20 bill at me a second before brushing past me. “Keep the change.”

Fuck it. In this town, money is money.

Pocketing it, I shovel a spoonful of oatmeal into my mouth and follow him out. “Usually after you tip your waitress, you leave the restaurant. Thanks for stopping by, please don’t come back.”

He chuckles darkly as he shoves his shirt over his head so quickly his hair gets ruffled. “If only it was so easy to get rid of me. You can stop pretending, Samuel. We both know you can’t decide if you want to kill me or fuck me. Just pick one so we can move on.”

My jaw goes slack as I’m slapped with the reality of that statement. Idowant to kill him. Idowant to fuck him, even if it’s just to prove something. Unbidden, my eyes drop down to the sliver of skin peeking out under the corner of his scrunched up shirt. “I’d rather sit on a rusty chainsaw, but tell yourself whatever you want. You just can’t handle the fact that there’s a woman alive who sees through your bullshit.”

This time he laughs loudly enough to make me twitch. “Woman, huh? All I see is a little girl.”

He reaches out to ruffle my hair, but I manage to duck away just out of reach. The comment hurts. I tell myself I don’t really care how he sees me, but I’ve grown up. He used to call me flat, but now I jump to put my jeans on and fill out a respectable C cup. My cheeks are hollowed out, no longer full or flush with adolescence. I’m nineteen years old. I’m not a little girl, physically or mentally.

Hayes just sucks.

“Climbing into a little girl’s bed is pedo behavior,” I counter. “And you’re a lot of things, but not that. I think the truth is that you can’t handle the fact that I’m all grown up andyouwant to fuckme.”

He steps in, his expression changing to something dangerous as he slowly backs me against the nearest wall. “If I wanted to fuck you, you’d already be on your knees choking on my cock as an apology for being a shit host since I got here. Luckily for you, I don’t fuck virgins.”

“I’ll gladly die one if it means you’ll stay the hell away from me. Call me a shit host all you want, but you reap what you sow, Sarro.” I let my eyes drop to his dick, letting all the years of pent up anger have a little fun. “Doubt there’d be enough to choke on, anyway.”

The grin that takes over his face is challenging in a way I don’t want to consider. “So you are a virgin? I wasn’t completely sure before, but damn. Sounds miserable, go figure you hate everyone.”

Shit.

“I do just fine by myself. Better than being a whore incapable of actual emotion,” I counter. “It must be so lonely for you knowing you’ll never be loved.”

“I do just fine by myself,” he tosses back at me. “Better than settling.”

I breathe again when he backs away to put his boots on, but for the first time, I think we’ve found some solid ground. “I suppose we just have different ways of making sure we don’t settle.”

“Suppose so.” He laces his boots up in silence and then regards me again. “Has anyone ever offered?”

Heat creeps up my neck, settling in my cheeks. “I don’t think that’s any of your business.” The truth is, Nate won’t give me the time of day because I am a virgin. He said he doesn’t have time to train me, but he’s still stringing me along anyway. I’ll diebefore I ever tell Hayes that. “What does it matter?”

He shrugs like he doesn’t actually care, but I can tell he takes my response as a no. He’s biting back a smile. “Doesn’t.”

It doesn’t matter because in his mind, he already knows exactly who I am, what I’m worth, and believes no one could ever want me. I’m the daughter of murder victims and the sister of a cop, so I’m as tainted as they come in Cape Frost. No one wants to touch the cursed girl.

But as he stands to leave, he looks me up and down like I’m not a person at all, just a piece of meat or some kind of aberration. Maybe both.

Ihatehim.

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