Page 22 of Sorrow

Aside from her usual attitude and ‘fuck you’ personality, I’ve never seen anything that told me there was so much going on inside of her. But after stripping her bare in one of the most personal ways and hearing her open up to me, it feels almost cruel to let her go sleep alone.

Not that I can do anything about it.

With my hand gripping the door handle, I let my forehead rest against the wood and give myself a moment to think. I can’t go into Boo’s room where she’s sleeping, I can’t invite her to stay. So where the hell does that leave us? Her as my fuck-doll at night and someone I don’t say more than two words to in the sunlight? It’s kind of fucked up, but in reality, I’m not the one who initiated this.

I’m not using her, she’s using me. She’s using me for the one thing she knows I’m good for, and then she’s going to leave this town behind with a man that isn’t me. One she believes to be husband material, not fuck-buddy material.

And why do I care?

I don’t.

But why is it — nah. No. I don’t.

I won’t.

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The next morning, I stay in my room longer than usual. I listen to her and Boo have breakfast before I even shower for the day, then stall for a couple more hours until I finally make my way out around noon. It’s probably a cowardly move, but it’s hard to know how to react in this situation. It isn’t like there’s aHow To Secretly Fuck Your BestFriend’s Little Sisterguide for dummies, so I’m winging it here. I don’t exactly have a choice.

Maybe I should write one after she’s got her two-and-a-half kids and a white picket fence.

“Damn, you slept in,” Boo chides, grinning at me like he knows I got laid. I didn’t, not really, but I definitely did... something. “Fun night?”

“Something like that.” I’ll humor him. I have to if I want to keep this up. Luckily for me Samara’s in Boo’s bedroom at the moment, so I don’t have to worry about how she feels about it. Not yet, anyway.

“Is this a repeat or a new one?”

“New.” I glance over at the hallway before I can stop myself, then back at him quickly in hopes he didn’t notice. He didn’t. He’s looking at his phone again. “You?”

Puzzled, he frowns up at me like he doesn’t know what I’m asking, so I nod down at his phone. “You’ve been on that a lot lately. Are you having luck on those dating apps?”

“Pfft. No. I’ve been working so much I haven’t opened any in a while. Probably should, though.” It’s his turn to look around for his little sister. “Need to fuck something, if you know what I mean.”

“Fuck yeah, I do.”

He chuckles at me. “You got laid yesterday, Hayes. There’s no way you know what I mean. You don’t even know what a dry spell is. You can pick up your phone right now and have your dick inside someone within the hour. Not all of us have that luxury.”

He’s wrong, but I’m not really in a place to tell him that. He needs to believe I can fuck anyone at any time if I’m going to get away with fucking the hell out of his little sister and walking out of my room with marks everywhere on my body. I can tell she’s the type, I just have to awaken it.

Just the thought has me hardening in my jeans. I lean forward to brace on my knees to hide it. “Yeah, that’s true. I’ll probably just call the new one over again tonight.”

“You fucked someone with Samara in the next room?” he asks. “I assumed you went to her house.”

Well shit, I didn’t think of that. “We were quiet.”

“Bullshit,” he whispers with a laugh. “There’s no way she didn’t hear it.”

“Did she say something?”

Shaking his head, he releases a sigh. “Guess she didn’t, and I’m not really in aplace to tell you not to have sex in your own house. I’m just thankful she’s here and I know she’s safe. I don’t trust anyone else to protect her.”

Yeah, I’m gonna need him to stop saying shit like that.

“Besides,” he continues. “I know you’d never invite someone over here that you didn’t trust. You don’t let many people even know where you live, so you must really like this new girl. Is she worthy of meeting me?”

He’s right. I don’t usually invite friends here, and I’veneverinvited a hookup. He knows that, so now he thinks I’m in love or some shit. Great. “Not yet. I’ll let you know if that changes.”

I turn the tv on before that conversation goes any further, then move over to the kitchen to put together some breakfast for myself. Or lunch seeing as it’s late as fuck, but whatever. I just need to eat.

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