Page 37 of The Heart of Midnight

I let her relax in silence as I try to reorient myself to where we are. I’ve only visited once when I helped Tex pick out the property we’re about to make our home, but everything kind of looks the same around here.

Thankfully, most Maldivians speak English and are nicer than Americans. They have no idea Muerte exists, let alone that I’m him, so getting directions to my house is easy enough. I could kiss Tex on the mouth for convincing me to lease from him since it’s so hard for foreigners to buy property here. We’ve still got work to do with the visas and we may eventually have to go somewhere else, but for now? It’ll do.

The place looks just like I remember it, in the middle of nowhere and basic as fuck. We’ve got everything we need here though. “Pretty girl,” I whisper. “Wake up. We’re home.”

“Home? Aren’t I there already?” Her skin is a little less pale as she opens her eyes and blinks around us, her grip on me tightening again as a smile overtakes her face. “I love it.”

She finally gets to her feet and I roll my shoulders and stretch my arms out while she’s distracted, not wanting her to feel guilty for falling asleep in my arms. I’d carry her all the time if it made her more comfortable. “You can thank Tex. Other than you, he’sthe only one who knows my secret. He told me we can lease this place as long as we need to, so get comfortable. We’ll have to apply for visas Monday but for now, this is home sweet home.”

She rushes off to take in the space, checking out every single room before she washes up in the bathroom and then moves back in to kiss me. “It’s perfect. I’m so happy you let me come.”

Truthfully, I’m not sure how I ever considered leaving without her. She’s the whole reason I was able to make an escape. “I love you,” I say simply. “And despite all the time I spent convincing myself you’d never love me back, I think you do. And if you don’t yet... then maybe there’s a chance one day you will.”

A smile grows on her face as she reaches out to touch mine. “I already do. I’ve loved you for a while, even before I realized, and I knew I couldn’t let you slip away. I love you.”

A few days ago, I’d have dismissed what she said as a delusion. But now? Knowing she knows every terrible thing I’ve ever done and chose to come with me anyway?

She might be the first person on this planet to ever truly love me. “Avery, I...” Fuck, why does my throat feel so thick? Suddenly my nose is burning and I can’t seem to speak. “I...”

“Shh,” she whispers, pulling me in so we can breathe the same air as she presses our faces together. “I’m here. I see you, I love you... and I accept you.”

Some monsters can’t be saved, and some just need one, single hand to reach out and actually care. I hope for her sake that I’m the second kind. “I’ll do my best to be as good for you as you are for me. I’ll do my best to earn it.”

“I know,” she says confidently, then switches conversations before I can get too emotional. “My only lines are scat and vomit. I just can’t with those, but if they’re important to you...”

Whoa. “Important? I can’t lie, I’ve considered facefucking you until you puke, but I don’t actually want you to puke. And asfor the other thing, I might be a murderer, but even I have lines. That’s definitely one of them.”

Smiling, my words seem to put her at ease in spite of the murderer joke. “Any lines for you?”

“Sharing. I won't share you. I know that’s not fair of me considering my past, but I only ever touched another woman because I was so pissed off I couldn’t have you. It’s not an excuse and doesn’t make it right, but you’ve always been enough for me. I’ll spend the rest of my life making it up to you.”

“I believe you. I don’t want anyone else either, so I have no complaints. You touch another woman and I’ll become the murderer.”

No one else could ever compare to her. It was always her face I saw, her body I pictured. The women I assaulted were just... a very unsatisfying, poorly thought out way of trying to give Avery a chance at a real life by distracting myself so I didn’t hurt her anymore. I never believed we’d have a white picket fence and a backyard swimming pool, but now? The trimmings don’t matter. I’ve got the only thing that matters.

“Avery Valentine, I’d have willingly spent the rest of my life in prison if you chose to turn me in. Do you think there’s another soul on this planet who I’d have done that for?”

She shakes her head no. “Ever? Have you ever loved anyone else?”

“I’ve never loved anything or anyone but you, and no one’s ever loved me, either. My point is that no one else could control me the way you do,” I admit. “You’ve got me completely.”

“Good.” She sweeps me up in a promising kiss that has me nearly taking more, but I can see the exhaustion in her eyes. Fun will have to wait until morning.

“Come on, pretty girl,” I say as I scoop her up and carry her to the bathroom. “Time for a quick shower and bed. Tex broughtsupplies here so we can brush our teeth and get into some clean clothes, and after that, I think we should sleep for a month.”

“That sounds good to me,” she mumbles. “We can finally truly relax and be free, we deserve some rest.”

I don’t know that I deserve anything at all other than a swift execution, but I recognize the gift she’s given me by loving me. It’s more than I could’ve ever dreamed of and she’s acting like it’s the easiest thing in the world for her. Maybe it is. Maybe every monster has an angel out there just waiting to find them, and she just happens to be mine.

Either way, I know she saved me. She saved me from prison, from death, from myself. There was once a time I couldn’t find any semblance of peace without taking a life, but right here, with her? I’m finally calm. My thoughts are quiet, and I’m staring down the barrel of a second chance instead of a gun.

I’m not gonna waste a minute of it.

Epilogue

Avery

Raw fear grips me as my knees scrape the forest floor, every trip and stumble bringing that deranged man closer to me, and with how quickly my heart is pounding I’m terrified he’s going to grab me at any moment.

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