Page 32 of Yours and Mine (Friends with Benefits)

“What did you tell him?”

“Nothing. I wanted to ask you about it first.”

I couldn’t help but feel disappointed. While the sneaking around had its advantages, I was proud to be Nick’s girlfriend, and no one even knew about it.

“I think we should break it gently to them. I don’t want to see Carter or Daisy moping around for the next two weeks before the prom, disappointed that we didn’t say yes.” I kicked a rock forward and watched it ripple the water on the flat lake ahead.

“I can see the wheels turning in your head.” Nick stepped in front of me, took me by my hips, and brought me closer to his body which at this moment, all sweaty and hot from our run, felt too distracting. “What are you thinking, Jo?”

“What if we each agree to go to the prom with them, then fix them up there? I’ll tell Carter how Daisy’s been asking about him but was too shy to say anything, and you can do the same with Daisy. Nick, they’re perfect for each other, and they don’t even know it.”

“Blindside them? This could turn ugly.”

“Or it could be the perfect set up. Daisy’s a good friend. She’ll understand and so will Carter.”

“All I know, is that at the end of that night, I want you in my arms, like this.” He lowered his mouth to mine, kissing me deeply. I stepped up on my toes and snaked my hands around his neck, plastering myself against him. No amount of sweat could have kept me away from Nick. I could stay in this moment forever.

He pulled away nervously. “There’s something I should tell you, Jo.”

For the past three months, I’d noticed that Nick was struggling with internal demons more and more. He’d talked about his father more often. He got upset when he saw the news of terrorism, bombs going off in airports and at concerts. I knew he wanted to make a difference, but I was afraid of what that meant. I hadn’t brought up the fact that he’d mentioned the navy earlier in the year, hoping that it was only a phase he’d been going through, but deep in my heart, I was afraid Nick was making decisions without saying a word, in fear of upsetting me. Up until now, I pretended that decision was still far away in the future. After all, he had applied to college.

“You’re making me nervous,” I whispered.

He led us to the rocks on the side and pulled my hand to sit down. Instead of joining me, he opted to sit behind me. His legs rested at the sides of mine, and his arms hugged my body from behind. Nick kissed the back of my head, took in a deep breath, and released it. I looked out over the lake, watching the waves silently lap against the rocky shore, afraid of what he was about to say.

“I’ve been avoiding this subject for a while now, but I can’t much longer, and I’d rather it wasn’t a shock.”

“I’m not going to like this, am I?”

“I’m sure you remember I mentioned that I might not be going to college.”

I pushed his arms to the side and turned around so that he could face me. Whatever devastating reason he had for this decision, I wanted him to say it to my face. But deep inside, I was afraid that I already knew the reason.

“I decided to be a SEAL — join the Navy, just like my father.”

“I was hoping you’d decide to make a difference in other ways. Like be a firefighter. Didn’t you say you wanted to be a fireman, Nick?”

He didn’t, but I was desperate, and we both knew it.

“I just got a letter notifying me that I passed my medical screening. My physical screening test is next week. If I get high scores, I’ll be able to skip right on to boot camp.”

I didn’t want to tell him that I didn’t understand half of what he was saying, because I didn’t want to understand.

“When did this happen?”

“I didn’t tell you because I didn’t want you worried.”

“Well, now I’m officially worried.”

“Jo, it won’t be that bad. It’s less than a year of training. Eighty percent of people who go through the training and tests either give up or fail, so I might even be back sooner.”

But I knew that Nick wasn’t a quitter. I knew that if he left, he’d succeed.

“Then why even try and waste all this time away from me?”

“I… I just have to do it. I want to try to be the man that my father was.”

“Nick, your father died in combat.”

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