Page 46 of I Was Always Yours (RCA: Royal Crown Academy)

He isn’t mine, no matter how much it feels like he might be.

I stumble back towards where I came from and a woman shows me to the locker room as I try to control my emotions.

My head and heart are torn between hate and jealousy that I just saw him with her and renewed anxiety at my upcoming ring girl role now that he’s going to be there.

The hate and jealousy smash the anxiety away as my vision turns red when I think back to what I just saw.

Fuck him.

He didn’t talk to me for two years because someone else kissedme, something that shouldn’t even have bothered him given his obvious hatred of me, and meanwhile he was fucking other people.

He’s never going to forgive me, and I’m done patiently waiting for that tomaybehappen. He doesn’t get to punish me for the blame he places on me regarding Astor’s accident forever.

I check my phone and see a new text in our girls’ group chat.

Nera:4th fight is over, we’re onto the 5th.

Followed by another two minutes ago.

Nera:Oop, this one is going fast. They’re waiting for you outside the locker room whenever you’re ready.

I slam open the cupboard, fueled by my anger at Phoenix, and take out the ‘uniform’. It’s basically a pair of cheeky red underwear and a sleeveless white crop top with a zipper down to the mid breast.

I put it on with some difficulty. The shirt is so tight that I can barely get it on and definitely not while wearing a bra. I finally get it over my head and down to my mid torso where it ends.

When I look in the mirror, even I can admit that I look good. The shorts accentuate the uncovered curve of my ass and the length of my legs down to my AF1s. The shirt molds to my breasts, making them look bigger than the C-cup they are. The material sticks to my skin and highlights my pierced nipple.

Good, I hope he can see it from wherever he stands. I hope it makes him crazy.

My hair falls in beach waves to the bottom of my back and my makeup highlights the green of my eyes. I look sexy and sultry, the perfect ring girl for a fight in an abandoned building.

I text the girls for a final hit of courage.

Me:I’ve seen Hooters waitresses with more clothes on than what I’m currently wearing.

Thayer:*records in 4k*

Me:Oh, and I just saw Phoenix. Guess he came to watch the fight as well.

Nera:You’re going to make him regret his whole life.

Me:He was about to go fuck Gloria so I’m pretty sure he won’t care.

Me:Putting my phone away, ttyl.

I place my phone in the locker with the rest of my clothes and close it. I go back in front of the mirror and point a finger at my reflection.

“No more letting that man ruin your life.” I say out loud, trying to imprint it in my brain.

A loud knock sounds at the door, making me jump.

“They’re waiting for you.”

“Coming!”

I brush through my hair one last time, then flip it over and fluff it to get some volume. When I walk out of the locker room, there’s a man waiting for me. He looks to be in his early twenties and his eyes widen comically when they fall on me.

“Holy–,” He starts, but stops and coughs uncomfortably when he catches me cocking my head at him, “Sorry, didn’t mean to be a creep but you look…good. Really good.”

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