Page 246 of Haunt Me

And we’re only just beginning.

There is so much more to explore, but just this, us, skin to skin, lips to lips, makes us feel so much, then I am going to savor every single moment of it. I will give my attention to every aspect of loving her and learning her, her body, her wants, her desires, her needs.

But for now, I enjoy the part of her she’s chosen to share with me.

I explore the symphony of her skin under my fingers, and put melody to her heaving sighs as the heat between us mounts. I am barely in control, but I’ve learned to wait. I’m better at it now than I was months before.

I can stop—it’s not easy, but I can. I will. In half an hour. Or two.

Afterwards, we lie there, facing each other.

“That music video,” she says quietly. I fight to focus on her words. It’s not easy. “That was—”

“It’s for you,” I interrupt her.

“For me?”

“Yes. The whole album is. Both of them.”

“You wrote all of these songs for…?”

“Yes,” I say again, before she can even finish her question. She falls silent. “Have you listened toIsaiah?” I ask, dreading the answer. She nods. “You know then.”

She blushes furiously. “I thought one or two might be…”

“All of them,” I interrupt her, meeting her gaze with an intensity that makes my whole body burn. “All of them are for you. But it must have been obvious to you.”

Deeper goes her blush. A slow smile spreads across my lips.

“Did I sound desperate?” I ask, leaning down until my lips are inches from hers. My eyes are fixed on hers, as if drawn by electricity.

“You sounded—"

“Because I am,” I interrupt her. “Desperate.”

“I saw you were in distress,” she says quietly. “I saw the clips of you on stage… I couldn’t stand it.”

I close my eyes. I’m getting dizzy again.

“I’m sorry you s-saw.” I’m struggling to speak. “I didn’t mean for you to see.” Only the entire rest of the world—well, I didn’t mean for them toseeeither, I just didn’t care. “I thought you would stay away from anything that had to do with me after what I did, after what I said in that interview…”

The forest is spinning again.

“That was stupid,” Eden says, grabbing my hand. My fingers close around her wrist as if it’s one thing that separates me from an agonizing death. “I know you said those things for the whole world to hear, but it turned out that you said different things in your songs. And not just inIsaiah. That… that second album. The re-done one. TheHeartmender. I didn’t know you were rewriting all your songs.”

“I didn’t know either,” I say.

Suddenly I hate it, I hate that I have brought us back here, in the same place that broke us. I try to stand, but it’s simply notpossible right now. Eden is looking at the bare branches over our heads. She looks cold, but not freezing. Her skin has that rosy hue it never used to have before, her cheeks glowing red in the wind.

“I shouldn’t have asked you to meet me in the woods,” I say. “I wouldn’t have, if I knew you were listening.”

“I love that you did. It’s good that you did.”

“I destroyed you,” I say, “Again. What’s good about that?”

“The hope,” she replies at once. Our eyes meet.

“I can barely look you in the eye,” I say. “I’m so ashamed of what happened back then here, of all that I was blind to. Being in this place brings it back in a way mere memories just don’t. All this time… Meeting you here every single day. Letting you down every day. Eden. How could I?”

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