Page 3 of Forever with the Mountain Man

Is what they say about lonely shepherds and their sheep true?

The sip of whiskey I just took sprays across the screen of my cell phone, and I have to use the sleeve of my flannel shirt to wipe it away. What a firebrand! No girl ever talks to me this way.

Looking at the ceiling of my rough-hewn cabin for a moment, I try to come back with something good. Something that lets her know I can dish out as well as she can.

But I’m not the sharpest tool in the shed. Never have been. As Mom or Ama would say, “If you don’t have a good head, then you better have good legs.” Legs won’t help me now, though. Instead, I go for sarcasm.

ME

Yeah, but I’m looking for something more fulfilling

The pillow talk is baaaaa-d

FELICITY

Bwahaha! You have a sense of humor

I’ve been accused of that before

Are these your real photos?

Do you like what you see?

Do you want the answer I give when I’m trying to impress a guy or the truth?

Touché

What, are you into fencing or something?

If mending fences counts

It would be a good skill to have with someone like me because I’m awful with relationships. I mean, duh, why else am I on here?

My heart pounds against my ribs as I flip through her profile pictures again. She has long brown hair with dark blond highlights that fall to her middle back and the most voluptuous figure I’ve seen in a while. Big tits, large hips, and an ass and thighs that make my mouth water. If these are, indeed, her photos.

ME

To meet a mountain man

Besides, you only have to be good with relationships once to be happy

FELICITY

Perpetual romantic. Are you telling me all I had to do is find a guy who’s into sheep?

No, all you had to do is stop ignoring me

…

The wait for her answer feels interminable. Have I said too much? My stomach roils as I watch the three dots that indicate she’s typing without seeing a response.

She must be conversing with other guys. It shouldn’t surprise me. She’s the hottest fucking thing I’ve ever seen on MountainMates. Maybe ever, although I reserve my final opinion for meeting in person. If we ever meet in person.

Over the past three months, I’ve given Mountain Mates a serious go with few results. That’s not to say there aren’t great catches on the app. But none of them are Felicity.

Maybe I’m a little enthusiastic about this woman. But I’ve got a limited amount of time to find my forever girl before my parents send for a wife for me from Euskal Herria, better known as Basque Country.

ME

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