Page 48 of Tied

With a decisive click, her voicemail ends. Menacing and adorable. I’m definitely never letting Carli and Julia meet. They’d swap recipes for disaster and mayhem. I wouldn’t fair well.

Once I make it through those, there’s only one left. Tyler.

Huffing into the line, he starts.

“Chris. I need to get this off my chest.” He pauses. I imagine him pacing around the room. “I’m not a needy man. I’m not going to chase you, and I won’t expect anything in the future. I had fun last night…well, this morning, and I wanted you to know I have no expectations. I said that already, didn’t I? Shit. Well….anyway, I hope the flight was good, and I hope that things settle down quickly for you. Good luck in the future. Yeah, I think I said that too. Okay. Bye.”

Clicking the repeat button, I replay it. I think I actually replay it four times before I decide to man up and call him.

As the phone rings, my heart rate jumps and my palms sweat.

“Hello?” Tyler says on the third ring.

“Hi. It’s...um. Me. Chris.”

“I’m glad you called.”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah. I, uh…I wanted to apologize for the crazy stalker type message I left. I don’t expect you—”

“It was nice to hear from you. I left your message for the end. I wanted to hear a friendly voice.”

With hesitation, Tyler’s voice softens. “Yeah? Well, okay then.”

“I got in a few hours ago. I’ve been going through all the voicemails, emails and stuff. Not as bad as I’d expected.” I want to say something like “I miss you,” but it feels needy and to soon. Instead, I stick with the pleasantries, though I’m aching to say something more.

We talk for almost an hour. I tell him about the worst of the calls, emails and letters, and he informs me that Julia is waiting for me to “fuck up,” as she put it.

“Well, I best be going. I have to get back to my condo. I’ll need to be ready for an ass chewing at work. I doubt it’ll go well.” I know it won’t go well. The senate committees were the worst of my emails. They want to go over some logistical issues they have with my performance. In other words, they want to oust my ass.

“Night. I hope it goes well. Call me if you want after. I have a short day tomorrow.”

“Night, Tyler.”

“Night, Chris.” By the time I hang up the phone, I’m feeling calm, and I’m actually more at peace than I’ve been in a long time. Tyler does that. He calms me. But as the room falls back into that deafening silence, the loneliness creeps back in.

I suck at being alone.

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