Page 94 of Warrior's Cross

Julian was shaking his head as he stood and pulled his black leather billfold out from his breast pocket. “Fucking wine,” he whispered, still in the Irish accent. Cameron was beginning to think it was real. He’d never seen Julian quite so unraveled.

He met Cameron’s eyes briefly before looking back at the money in his hands. “He was lying,” he added as he began counting out the money to pay the bill.

Cameron watched him, aware of the longing and upset in his expression and not caring about hiding it anymore. “Lying about what?” he asked in a pained voice.

Julian looked up at him as if surprised that he’d actually spoken.

“There being anyone other than you,” he answered bluntly.

Cameron inhaled sharply and wrapped his arms around his middle, his eyes remaining locked on Julian the whole time. He had to step back, or he’d never be able to look away. And herealized with a painful jolt that this just might be his last chance. “I’m sorry,” he said abruptly. “For what I said.”

Julian looked at him closely and gave a slight jerk of his head to the side in response before looking back down at the money he was counting. “Is that because I’m about to die?” he asked calmly.

Cameron couldn’t stop the soft whimper this time. “No. Because I was afraid. Because you didn’t deserve it,” he said pleadingly, willing Julian to understand.

“Yes, I did,” Julian assured him with a small nod. He placed the rest of the bills on the table and then looked up as he buttoned his jacket. He looked heartbreakingly sad, which scared Cameron even more. “Will you tell Blake something for me?” he asked softly.

Cameron gave a small nod.

“Tell him to run like hell if I don’t come back.”

Cameron swallowed on the knot in his throat and nodded again.

“He’ll be waiting for you, won’t he? Lancaster. He wants to kill you.”

Julian nodded minutely. “Tell Blake I’ll come here if I’m able,” he requested hoarsely.

Cameron could see the tangible defeat on Julian’s shoulders, and it made him angry. Julian had always been strong and stoic, and this ghost of who he had been was wrong. So very wrong.

“You’ve given up,” he said accusingly. “What happened to ‘I’m good at what I do’?” he demanded.

“He’s good at what he does as well,” Julian responded calmly. “There’s a price that comes with doing what I do,” he explained distantly. “We all pay it in the end. Just tell Blake,” he requested, barely able to say the words.

Cameron was struck speechless by the mixture of defeat and longing and fear in the black depths of Julian’s eyes. His heartbroke with an almost physical pain as he realized what he had truly done to the man, a man who had once been so magnificent. It had never been Julian who’d been capable of breaking anything in their relationship, Cameron realized. He’d had all the power all along.

Julian opened his mouth as if to say something more, but then he bowed his head slightly and turned, walking out of the restaurant without a backward glance.

Cameron stared at the glass doors where Julian had exited until Blake appeared shortly thereafter, obviously having been forewarned that this little meeting was going to be taking place. Cameron realized his boss had been hiding all these months, and he had no reason to hide now that Lancaster had somehow found Julian.

“Cameron?” Blake murmured to him.

The waiter turned to look at Blake. “He said he’d come back here if he was able,” he said woodenly. “He said if he didn’t that you should run like hell.”

Blake nodded, looking pale and drawn, and he looked at the door as if he could somehow see what was happening somewhere out in the city through the glass. He looked back at Cameron and let out a slow, shaky breath. “Did he say anything else?” he asked worriedly.

Cameron’s reply was a bare whisper. “He said he was about to die.”

Blake saw the last guests out just after midnight, not much later than usual. Leaving the cleanup to the other employees for once, Cameron joined him at the bar.

“Are you waiting for him?” he asked shakily.

Blake nodded as he wiped down the bar. He looked up at Cameron and nodded again. “If he said he’d come here, then he will. And if he doesn’t, it’ll be Lancaster coming after me. If he wants me, he’ll have to walk through a double barrel to get to me,” he said determinedly, and Cameron noticed the shotgun leaning against the bar. He was surprised by its sudden appearance, but he told himself that after Julian, nothing should really shock him anymore. “Julian didn’t run like I begged him to,” Blake said grimly. “I won’t either.”

Cameron stared at him in stunned silence for several moments as he came to a decision. “Can I wait with you?” he finally asked.

Blake looked up at Cameron sadly. “It won’t be pretty, no matter who comes back,” he warned. “He might kill you, too, if he has the chance.”

Cameron merely nodded in return. That scenario was out of his hands, and he knew it. If Arlo wanted him dead, there was nothing he could do to stop him.