Page 51 of Warrior's Cross

“You already made that decision. Didn’t you?” Cameron pointed out evenly, although his heart was pounding anxiously. “Just by asking me to take a walk in the snow on Christmas Eve.”

Julian pulled away as if Cameron had smacked him, and he sat back in the chair in a daze.

Cameron watched his reaction solemnly. “I wouldn’t change it,” he said. “Not for anything. I hoped... you felt the same.”

“I can’t say that I do,” Julian breathed in an offended voice. “I wouldn’t have you hurt.”

A no-win situation, for sure. Cameron’s breath caught painfully, and he had to look away to blink through the upset as he tried to draw in air without coughing. When he thought he had it under control, he spoke. “So now what?” came out in a clogged rasp. It wasn’t logical that he would choose Julian over his own safety, Cameron knew. He would, though, and logic be damned.

“I should have told you from the beginning,” Julian told him softly. “I should have let you know the danger, and I’m sorry for not doing it. I can’t make your choices for you, though.”

Cameron would have laughed if he could have gotten enough air to do it. Julian was talking himself in circles, obviously struggling with the topic just as much as he was. “No, you can’t,” he said weakly before finally having to cough hard as Julian watched him helplessly.

Gasping for breath, Cameron closed his eyes after the effort. “I wouldn’t change it,” he whispered, opening watery eyes to look at Julian. “Please don’t make me.”

Julian lowered his head to try to hide the relief in his eyes. “I won’t,” he promised with difficulty.

Struggling through several shortened breaths, Cameron curled his hands into the sheets and tried to relax again. He could feel the threat of tears, which was the last thing he wanted or needed, so instead he let the choppy breaths take his energy.

“What if something happens to you?” Julian asked suddenly, obviously unable to let the topic go just yet.

Letting out a shaky breath as fear of the unknown clutched at his throat, Cameron realized he had no answer. “I don’t know,” he responded bluntly. “What if something happens to you?”

Julian blinked in surprise. “To me?” he asked.

Cameron exhaled in disbelief. “Yes, Julian. What if something happens toyou?”

“Nothing will happen to me,” Julian assured him softly, seeming to fall back into his natural confidence.

Cameron raised an eyebrow disbelievingly and looked at the scrapes on Julian’s cheek pointedly. “You asked ‘what if’ first.” He sighed heavily. “You’ll just have to protect me, won’t you?” he finally said, lifting his hand to his bare throat where the necklace usually hung.

He’d taken it off days ago when applying copious amounts of Vicks and hadn’t put it back on.

The motion drew Julian’s eyes, and he stared at the spot where the warrior’s cross should have been for a long moment of silence. Finally his lips twitched slightly. “Does that mean I have to protect your dogs as well?” he asked as he looked back up to meet Cameron’s eyes.

Biting his lip on a laugh, Cameron tried to look appropriately sober. “I don’t know. They’re awfully ferocious on their own.” He couldn’t help the heartfelt desire in his eyes from showing. He wanted to be with Julian, no matter the risk of some nebulous danger that might not ever happen. He’d found someone he wanted, and that someone wanted him in return. Cameron wouldn’t give that up without a fight.

Julian leaned forward again and ran his fingers along Cameron’s cheek. He stared for a long moment, and then he stood and bent over him to kiss his temple carefully. “I have to go,” he said regretfully.

Cameron covered Julian’s hand, and his eyes fell shut as he felt Julian’s lips. “I’ll be here.”

“Take care of yourself,” Julian whispered into his ear.

Opening his eyes just in time to see Julian pass through the door, Cameron sighed shakily. “You do the same,” he said to the empty room.

“So what have we learned from this little escapade?” Julian asked as he broke the bag inside his instant ice pack and shook it angrily.

“Down doesn’t always mean dead, sir,” Preston answered obediently.

“And if the mark is wearing body armor?” Julian asked irritably as he pressed the ice to his temple and closed his eyes.

“Always take the head shot, sir,” Preston rattled off, obviously trying to hide the fact that he was smiling as he drove.

“Of course it’s funny,” Julian snapped. “You’re not the one who got tackled by fucking Lazarus!”

“Twice, sir.”

“Twice!”

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