Page 34 of One Last Wish

While I was reaching to look around to see if my phone was anywhere nearby, Darce appeared at the door with my backsack.

“Well, you’re definitely into dramatics, I’ll give you that,” he teased, his eyes raking over me. “How are you feeling?”

“Thirsty and hungry.”

“Good thing I got snacks.” Placing my bag on the green sofa, Darce proceeded to show me what he’d packed. A change of clothes for tomorrow, the nightwear that was on my bed, my toothbrush with a few other washroom products, and most importantly, my headphones, phone and the book I was currently reading. “I drew the line at going into your underwear drawer.”

“Afraid you might want to sniff my panties?” I joked as he passed me the chocolate and soda he’d gotten.

“No, but that’s why Evelyn sent me instead of Theo.”

“That was probably a good call.” The chocolate tasted so good that a small moan escaped my lips.

“Are we going to talk about it?”

“What?” I asked, opening the can of soda. Sugar was good for me right now. I didn’t care if a doctor came in and told me off.

“You’re blackouts, Alora. How long have you been having them?” His tone seemed a little clipped.

“All my life.It’s nothing.”

Darce sucked in a breath, alarmed. “Allyour life? Alora, that...” He was actually lost for words. “What makes them come on?”

“Why should I tell you, when I knownothingabout you?”

“Okay, fair point. What do you want to know? You getonequestion.” Yes! I had to think carefully. Getting under that thick skin of his wasn’t easy. I needed to ask him something that might break him down a little.

“Have you ever been physically close to anyone?” Knowing I wanted to have sex with this guy, the biggest burning question I had was if he could be intimate with people. “With your no skin contact issue, I mean.”

“Are you asking if I’ve hadsex?” His eyes were so alive with humour. “All the questions you could ask, andthat’swhat you went for?”

“Answer the damn question.”

“Yes, Alora. I’ve had sexplentyof times.”

“So youcantouch people?”

“That’stwoquestions.”

I continued. “Is it more a trust issue? People can touch you once you feel safe with them?”

“Alora, I gave you my answer. Now, it’s your turn.”Damn him!

“I’m unable to form connections with people. That’s what brings on the black outs,” I whispered, looking down at my hands. “My mind...it...works differently to other people’s.”

“Connections?” Darce questioned, tilting his head. “What do you mean by that exactly?” Could I confide in him? Would he realise I was crazy and finally keep his distance? Searching those dark, universe specked eyes of his, I found something that strangely felt familiar to me. It was almost like...home. “You can trust me, Alora,” Darce whispered, touching my arm that was covered by my hospital blanket.

“Feelings. I don’t connect to people out of choice. My mind simply won’t allow it. The moment I get a connection or feelings for someone, I have a panic attack. Or worse...I black out. I couldn't even connect with my own father.”

“What feelings made you black out this time?”

“My feelings foryou,” I whispered, moving my hand from the blanket to reach for his hand. There was no doubt I wanted tofeelsomething for him.

“No,” he choked. “No, Alora. This isallwrong. I have to go.”

“I’m letting you in! Why can’t you do the same?” I called out as he reached the door.

“There is too much at stake. You have no idea of the complications...theeffortI’ve gone to...” Darce stopped mid-sentence and ran his hand through his hair. “Get some rest. I’ll see you tomorrow.”

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