Page 46 of Billionaire Lumberjack's Bargain

The chilly early fall breeze blows across me now that the cabin no longer blocks most of it, and it carries the smell of the fire burning in the fireplace, leaves just starting to change color, and all the other familiar scents of the mountain.

Inhaling deeply, I hold it in my lungs for a moment, considering the fact that only a few short months ago, I thought I would have to leave this place. I believed I’d never experience fall on the homestead again, that Davey would never play in the golden and red leaf piles or watch the first winter snow from his bedroom window another time.

I’m happy to be rid of the scalding heat of the summer, especially now that I’m into my third trimester and feel like a bloated whale waddling everywhere, but the further we slip into autumn, the closer we get to this baby coming and the more aware I become that we’re not ready.

Not by a long shot.

The seemingly never-ending list of tasks—big and small—haunts me every night. Though it’s better than the nightmare that used to come every night.

Always the same.

A single moment in time.

The one that changed everything.

Replayed in my mind on an endless loop whenever I closed my eyes.

I can’t even remember when it started to dissipate. I just know that slowly, over the last few months, it became less and less frequent, until I only wake in a cold sweat and sobbing every once in a while instead of every single night.

Maybe the sense of security the James men have offered us has helped me put that memory into the vault where it belongs, but seeing our little girl on that monitor today brought it roaring back with such clarity that Doc was concerned I was losing it.

He wasn’t far off.

I shouldn’t have gone to the appointment alone.

That stubborn streak Dave always accused me of having certainly didn’t go away when he did. If anything, it comes back more frequently, as a defense mechanism whenever Dalton gets too close or says something that reminds me how badly I want him with me at times, like lying on that clinic bed today.

Which isn’t fair.

Not to Dave.

And certainly not to Dalton.

Even now, as I make my way down the narrow path through the woods toward the large clearing Dave always used when he was cutting wood where Dalton has also set up shop, I half expect to find a different man there.

The one who asked me out from an ER bed after he came in with his head split open by a construction site accident before he even knew my name.

Who got down on one knee after only a dozen dates because he said he justknewI was “it” for him.

My hand drifts over where the baby kicks, and I rub at the spot, fighting the tears that want to fall. “Your daddy loves you so damn much, little girl.”

The sound of the axe whacking against logs echoes off all the tree trunks around me, a steady rhythm that starts to vibrate in my chest the closer I move toward it, until Dalton finally comes into view across the clearing from me.

Bright sun beats down on him, his chest glistening slightly with sweat as he raises the blade and slams it down on another log, splitting it in half. Pieces pile up on either side of the giant stump he uses as a base, and he grabs another one, sets it on its side, and swings the weapon in the practiced motion that seems almost second nature to him.

He catches me moving toward him out of the corner of his eye and sets down the axe, a grin pulling at his lips as I approach. “You’re back.”

I nod as I stop a few feet from him, staring at the massive piles of firewood that are all going to have to be moved into storage. “I am.”

His chest heaves, his breathing struggling to return to normal after what must have been an insane amount of felling and splitting all morning. “Is everything all right?”

I nod, forcing myself to keep my eyes on his instead of drifting down his shiny torso. “Perfect.”

Relief relaxes his features and shoulders, as if he’s been carrying that tension since the moment I left this morning. Maybe he has been. “Good.”

“I found out the sex of the baby…”

His eyes widen, the excitement practically pouring off him the same way it did Davey. “And? Don’t leave me hanging.”

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