Page 90 of Malice

“Oh, I know. Just the opposite. Hudson, listen to me. This might be hard to accept, but I wouldn’t be telling you if I didn’t firmly believe it was true.”

I brace myself for whatever she’s about to say next.Please don’t tell me Aster is a bad guy.“Okay.”

“Okay.” I hear her blow out a breath. “Aster is the one, Hudson. He’s the guy you’ve wished for all your life.”

Wasn’t expecting that. “What do you mean?”

“I didn’t know you felt so unseen. So unloved.” Her voice breaks. “All you’ve ever wanted is for someone to see you as youare and love you, warts and all, but every guy you’ve met has been shallow.”

“Yes, but?—”

“Aster sees you. Completely. All he wants is a safe place to land in a life of chaos. He feels that with you, but he’s scared. You’re both so scared.”

I glance around to make sure Aster is still outside with Otto. “What is Aster scared of?”

“That’s where I kept getting blocked. All I could see is that it has something to do with his work. Being in a relationship with him won’t be normal or conventional. You have to be prepared for that.”

To say the least. “He… does he have feelings for me?”

“Far beyond his responsibilities. Try to believe what he says to you. Your job is to finally tear down your emotional wall. If you can, everything you’ve ever wanted is on the other side.”

I try to swallow down the lump that forms in my throat. “I want to stay with him, Joss, but I don’t even know how to tell him that.” I cough to clear the emotion away. “And you’re sure this isn’t some kind of trauma bonding? The therapist said it’s really common after an abusive situation.”

“I’m absolutely positive that your bond transcends anything that’s happened in either of your pasts. It’s real. Hold on to it. Let Aster guide you. He won’t let you fall.”

I blow out a breath. “I wish I’d known you could do this kind of thing. I would’ve consulted you a lot sooner.”

Joss chuckles. “I wouldn’t have been as helpful. I’ve never been this clear in a reading. It’s an area I’ve been trying to improve, actually. I think it’s the topic. It’s so strong I think a novice could see it. I feel like… I don’t know, it’ll probably sound crazy to you, but it’s almost like Fate itself is guiding me through these cards.”

My chest tightens. “That must be good, right?”

“Very good, Hud. I was so excited! I’ve been sitting on this for hours waiting for a somewhat decent time to call.”

“I’ve been up since three.”

“Why? Is everything okay?”

“It is now. I’m safe.”

“Good.”

“Hey. What do you know about astral planes?”

“Uh, not much. There’s a gal in my coven who does astral projection frequently, but it takes practice. I’ve never tried it. Why?”

“Aster did it with help from Wilder. He’s… uh… a friend. The one who broke the spell on the house. Aster had to go there to deal with the Horror, but he said anyone can go there.”

“That’s true, but if you’re thinking about it, you should think twice. That’s not entry-level stuff.”

“What happens there?”

“Anything can happen. You’re not playing by the rules we’re familiar with. I’m well versed in this stuff and I won’t try. Neither will Elaina. Are you thinking about it?”

The slight panic in her voice makes it clear that would be a bad idea. “No. I was just curious.”

“You’re sure?”

I sit back on the couch, scratching the scruff on my chin. “I’m not gonna do anything, but I wish there was a way I could confront Chester. The Horror. I want to take back the power he stole from me. I know he’s dead, but he reacts to things that happened when he was alive. He reacts to being called Chester. There’s a part of him still in there. That probably sounds dumb, right?”

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