Page 76 of Restrained

I shake my head. His hand moves to my cheek. “No. I don’t even like baths.” I feel the blush heat my cheeks. “Unless you’re in them with me.”

He smiles sweetly, his hard edges softening for me. “You think that’s weird? That you don’t like to swim?”

“It is, Hayden.” I stand up, his touch too much for me right now. I walk out of his office to his patio door, seeing the sun has begun to set. I feel him behind me, but he doesn’t speak. “I moved to California. I live in a beach house. I have an underground pool.”

I feel him shifting behind me, the sound of clothing being removed and then see his very expensive jacket hit the floor. “And you think that’s weird.”

It’s not a question. “I know it is.”

I almost turn around when I see his matching charcoal vest fall onto his jacket next to me, but I don’t. “Why?”

“Because I’m afraid of the water. Fucking terrified. I hate it, Hayden.”

His shoes and socks drop to my side next. “Why?”

This man is infuriating. I turn around, ready to throttle him when I notice his white shirt is unbuttoned, and I get a little lost in his ripped abs and his stupid, handsome grin as he removes it from his shoulders and lets it drop on the ground. “What are you doing?”

He only smiles in that confident Hayden way that makes me want to kiss and slap him at the same time. He takes my hand in his and pulls it to his hip bone near that sexy fucking V. My fingers drag over the raised skin there as I examine the scar. “My dad burned me. Took a fucking lighter to my skin. I could smell my own flesh burning. Because he hated me. Because he hated my mother.” Tears well in my eyes as my thumb circles the now healed skin. “Because he hated himself.”

I look up. “I’m so sorry Hayden. You deserved better than that monster.”

I watch his lips, full and strong as he speaks directly to me like nothing else matters. “I have better now. I have so much better. But that’s not my point.”

“What is?”

“He did a lot of shit to me. A lot, but the thing I feared the most was fire. That hurt. Fucking bad. I was five, and I was terrified of fire after that. I still don’t like the smell of anything burning. I don’t own a grill, and I'm thirty.”

“That’s awful.”

“I know. Grilled food looks delicious.”

I laugh—actually laugh—during a twisted, horrific conversation, and he grins. “It’s not weird. You went through a trauma, and your brain is trying to protect you.”

He unbuttons his pants and then pushes them to the floor, kicking them away. Now standing only in his briefs he holds his hand out to me again.

“Now, if you want to swim and you want me there, holding your hand the entire time, let’s go. You and me. Us.”

My heart flutters in my chest at that word. That word I love. “Us?”

“Us. I’ve never been an us, but I think that’s how it works.”

I nod. “Seems to work for Penelope and Lincoln.”

He smiles. “I won’t ever force you, though. You don’t want to swim? Fuck it. We’ll stay dry unless we’re in the bedroom or the shower.” He winks, and I chuckle.

“You are ridiculous and far goofier than I’d have ever thought.”

“Yeah, I didn’t know I had a funny side until I met you.” His hands move to my hips, and he pulls me to him, pressing a kiss to my forehead. “You make me want to laugh. Youreallymake me want to make you laugh.”

His face pulls away from mine, and he bends his knees to look into my eyes. I never knew I wanted this, but looking into his eyes, there’s so many things I want to say to him.

“What are you thinking?”

That I'm a coward.“I want to swim.”

That’s not what I was thinking. He smiles. “Okay.”

His hand slides the zipper of my gray dress down, and I slip it off, standing only in my teal bra and panty set. “I’m afraid.”