Page 31 of Smooth As Whiskey

And he was there if I needed him

And he had killed two men for me.

But everything else?

He was nothing like Coal, and Pipe was to Adeline and Gabby.

And yes, I knew that they were their ol’ ladies, but even before they made things official, they still treated them better than Irish did to me.

But my stupid heart didn’t care about any of that.

I sighed as I ran my hand through the little girl’s brown locks.

This right here was what every little girl dreamed of.

Having someone to be there for them.

To care for them.

To worry about any nightmares that may come for them in their sleep.

And to be there to chase them away.

I hadn’t realized that Irish was home when I heard, “Is she sleeping?”

I smiled up at him and nodded.

He nodded, then moved to lift her, but I tagged his forearm and whispered, “Can we talk once you lay her down.”

His eyes locked on mine; he took in a breath and nodded.

I waited on the couch for him to put Maisie in her bed.

When he came back, he toed off his boots and then sat down on the couch.

I waited for a beat, then I said, “Irish when I came to the clubhouse, I didn’t know anyone. Or hardly anything. I lead with my heart. But when I became a club girl, I had no clue what was going to happen. I just knew I needed a safe space. To be allowed to learn who I am outside of that hell. And the club gave me that. You gave me that, Irish. So, I get it. Okay. I do. After the things I’ve seen with you and how you are, I get it. But I need to tell you, even though I’ve tried my best to show you. I’m in love with you. Totally in love with you.”

He nodded.

He freaking nodded.

Umm. Okay.

What did that mean?

And then, he spoke, “You said that the concept of love was foreign to me, and you were right. I don’t know how to love anyone. Never been loved, so how the fuck would I know?”

“But you have been, Irish. By your club brothers and by me. And soon by that little girl.” I pleaded with him.

When he didn’t reply, I said, “I want you, Irish. I want all of you. We connect. We understand each other. When you walk in a room, my breath hitches. I close my eyes at night, and it’s you, I see. Do you know what I see when I look into your eyes? I see itall. I see everything. All my hopes. And all of my dreams. And I know you feel it, too. You have to.”

I waited after pouring my heart out to him.

And I waited.

And I waited.

I was about to open my mouth to plead even more until he took the dagger he’s always holding in his hand when it comes to me and plunged it into my heart, “I can’t give you an answer, Sutton. I just can’t.”

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