Page 17 of Forged

Nick shrugged. “I don’t think it’s that specifically. She loves that one guy on Antiques Roadshow.” Nick rolled his eyes. “What she really doesn’t like is people who don’t fit into her box of how she thinks people are supposed to be.”

That made all the sense in the world, too.

“How does she think you should be?” he asked, even though it felt like a huge risk.

Nick tensed almost imperceptibly, then blew out a breath and sagged. “I should be predictable and stable. I should be rushing to find a new wife to take care of my babies for me so that I can go off and be, I don’t know, an accountant?” He grinned at Bax.

Was the mantryingto make him fall head over heels in love? Bax was already well on his way to being lost where Nick was concerned. To have the man tease him and be so open with him was a better aphrodisiac than any magic he’d ever been involved with in the past.

“What do you want?” he asked, taking the biggest risk of all and reaching out to rest his hand on top of Nick’s hand where it rested on his thigh. “Who do you want to be?”

Nick slowly raised his eyes to meet Bax’s. There was something there other than casual friendship or familycloseness. It was raw and vulnerable, like Nick trusted him with the fragility of his emotions.

Better still, Nick twisted his hand so that he could hold Bax’s as he said, “I just want to be a good father and a good man. I want to be true to myself and my art, too, but instead, since Raina’s death, I feel so distant from it. For more than a year, I feel like I’ve just been going through the motions, trying to figure out who I am now, without her.”

“It takes time to move on when you’ve had a big life change,” Bax said.

No sooner were the words past his lips than they circled back to hit him in the heart. He knew what he was talking about a little too well. He’d just ended not only a relationship, but a fellowship with some of the few people he’d ever met who understood him on a deeper level.

Nick wasn’t the only one flailing around like a tired kid in a supermarket, just wanting to go home. Bax was right there with him.

“Yeah, time,” Nick said with a sad smile. “At least we’ve got each other while that time passes.”

It was such a simple thing to say, but the words nearly knocked the wind out of Bax. The words and the genuine affection in Nick’s eyes. They had something. They absolutely had something. Bax just needed to figure out what it was and how far it could go.

“Come on,” he said, pulling his hand out of Nick’s and slapping his thigh. “Let’s do some art. I don’t know anything about forging or metalwork, but if you tell me to hold something, I can hold it.”

It was a sure sign of how much he was genuinely falling for Nick that he didn’t even turn those words into an innuendo.

SIX

Throughout the next week,Bax remained at the forefront of Nick’s thoughts. It was the weirdest thing. He woke up in the morning wondering if Bax had had a good night’s sleep. He got the kids up and fed them breakfast while contemplating asking Bax if he wanted to come over and have breakfast with them. During the day, as he taught his classes and worked on his sculpture, every gust of wind or random person walking past as the film crew wrapped up their work at Hawthorne House made him look to see if Bax might visit him at the forge.

It was getting ridiculous. Especially when Bax was nowhere to be found up at the house on Friday evening.

“You haven’t seen him around, have you?” he asked Blaine when they met in the hallway after Nick had gone to pick up the kids after they’d spent the afternoon with Granny Janice.

“Oh, he’s not here,” Blaine said, coming out of his flat and locking his door behind him. “There’s a formal dance at The Chameleon Club tonight and a bunch of us are going to that.”

“A formal dance?” Nick asked. “Like in school?”

That would explain why Blaine was dressed in a plaid suit with a flouncy collar and why, if Nick wasn’t mistaken, he was wearing eyeliner and lipstick.

“Absolutely like in school, but a million times gayer,” Blaine said with a broad grin. “I feel like the star rugby player asked me to be his date.”

Nick laughed, but he felt more anxious than amused as Blaine sauntered off, probably to meet Alfie and head to the dance. Why he was anxious, he didn’t know. The Chameleon Club was a fancy club in the heart of London owned by The Brotherhood, which was a centuries old organization of gay men. They looked out for each other’s welfare and had tight social connections. It was probably exactly the sort of organization Bax needed after losing his coven.

That was the problem, though. As Nick got the kids settled in the lounge and started supper, he couldn’t shake the uncomfortable feeling that niggled him like an itch in the middle of his back. Baxshouldfind a new social group of people like him. That didn’t mean they wouldn’t be friends anymore. That wouldn’t mean Bax would leave him behind.

Why should it matter to him in any event? He and Bax were just friends. That was all they could be considering Nick wasn’t gay.

Even thinking that sent even more itchy, uncomfortable feelings shooting down Nick’s back. He wasn’t gay. He’d only ever liked women. Except for maybe Matt Allenson, who had been in one of the Art History classes he’d taken at uni. Matt had been extremely feminine and had flirted shamelessly with him. He’d already started dating Raina at that point. Raina had teased him mercilessly over the way he blushed and turned shy whenever Matt was around. She’d joked about Matt being his crush. But she’d never seemed genuinely jealous, so Nick had always brushed the entire Matt thing off as silliness.

Bax wasn’t like Matt, though. He wasn’t feminine, although he was gentle and graceful. But not when he was working out or going on one of his long nature walks.

Nick started joining Bax on his nature walks a few days after the Sainsbury’s trip. It was a ridiculous thing to do, what with the amount of work he needed to get done in the forge and the care and attention the kids required.

“You need more exercise,” Bax told him when he hemmed and hawed about accepting the invitation that first morning he was asked. “Something more than wielding a blacksmith’s hammer, at least. There’s nothing wrong with your arms, but a little walk now and then will be good for your heart.”

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