Page 63 of Forged

The touch was electric, but not in the good ways that touching Nick were. It was like someone had thrust his hand into an electrical socket.

He pulled away and cleared his throat. “I don’t know, Callum,” he said. He reached for his teacup only to find he’d already drunk all the tea. He wouldn’t be able to hide from his discomfort that way.

“Alright, you’ve found me out,” Callum went on, as if Bax had interrogated him. “It’s you I want.” He inched closer to Bax and lowered his voice. “I’ve always been fond of you, Baxter. We’ve had some good times together. If I hadn’t been with Stephen at the time and you hadn’t been with Damien, I would have pursued something with you.”

“I’m not sure—” Bax began.

“We have a chance now, though,” Callum interrupted. “I can’t imagine that you’re actually serious with Nick. He’s a lovely man and a brilliant artist and teacher, but he’s not our sort at all.”

Bax frowned as deep, roaring protectiveness for Nick rolled through him. “Nick and I are together,” he said.

“Yes, but should you be?” Callum asked.

Bax opened his mouth to defend his relationship, but Callum cut in once again.

“Nick is rough around the edges. He doesn’t understand deeper things. If we lived two hundred years ago, he’d be the grubby blacksmith shoeing your horses while you lived in the manor, commanding an army of servants.”

Bax gaped at Callum, blown away by the classism that he hadn’t realized Callum clung to.

“My dad was the second son and I’m way down the list of his heirs,” he said, though even that defense felt like he was buying into Callum’s warped worldview.

“And Nick has kids,” Callum went on, ignoring his argument. Unfortunately, he hit on the biggest argument Bax had been having with himself. “Who wants to spend all their time running around after mewling children?” Callum asked. “Children are such a bother. They’re messy, you can’t hold a conversation with them, and you certainly can’t express yourself fully when they’re around, if you know what I mean.”

Bax clenched his jaw and forced himself to breathe before saying anything he might regret. A wealth of feelings that were new and raw, but that had been hiding under his restlessness and uncertainty, suddenly welled up.

“I happen to love those children,” he told Callum. “They’re my cousin Raina’s children. They’re Hawthornes. And they’re adorable.”

Callum’s face started to lose color and he leaned back a bit at the force of Bax’s words, like he realized he’d said the wrong thing. “Oh, I?—”

“Yes, children take a lot of attention and effort to raise,” Bax went on. “Usually there are at least two people involved in the process, but Nick is doing it all on his own. He’s doing an amazing job, too. And yes, sometimes he has to prioritize the kids over me, but I’m not so sure I really need to be at the center of his attention all the time either. I’ve got a business to build, afamily to enjoy, and a faith that, as you said, I’m serious about. I need to give my time and attention to those things, too.”

It was suddenly so clear. Relationships weren’t about obsession with the other person. He’d seen relationships where the partners focused only on each other and nothing else. They tended to fall apart spectacularly once the infatuation stage was over. A real partnership was about facing the world together.

He didn’t need Nick to ignore his kids so he could cater to every one of his whims. It probably wouldn’t be good for him to always get his way anyhow. Even though it stung a little to be interrupted when he wanted to spend focused time with Nick, there had to be a way they could work together to find other time for each other. They lived in a gigantic manor house filled with family. Help was right around the corner at any time of the day or night.

“I’m sorry, Callum, I’ve got to go,” he said, standing and stepping away from the table.

“So you’re not going to join me?” Callum asked, his expression pinched to false innocence and one last hope of swaying Bax away from what he wanted so desperately he could feel it in the beat of his heart.

“No,” Bax said, then nodded goodbye.

He’d been stubborn when it came to what he thought he wanted from a relationship so far. Rafe was right in saying people changed and grew. Changing and growing was the reason he’d split with Damien in the first place. He’d left that relationship because it wasn’t right for him, and it had stopped being right for him because he was a different person now than he’d been when he and Damien had started dating.

He was a person who needed more than just a lover and a coven to serve his needs. He needed to be part of something bigger than himself, part of a family.

The drive back to Hawthorne House felt like it took forever, but it gave his sprouting thoughts time to grow and develop. He didn’t know what the future had in store for him and Nick, he just knew that he wanted to find a way to make it work. That would take giving up some of his ego on the one hand and probably some changes on Nick’s end as well. He needed to be careful not to frame the changes that both of them needed to make so they could grow their relationship with each other as demands, but instinct and his understanding of Nick made him certain they could work it out.

He was in a good mood as he drove into the family parking lot at Hawthorne House, but that mood was instantly shattered at the sight of Nick packing the back of his mum’s car with boxes and suitcases. Something more than just an overnight visit was going on.

“What’s all this?” he asked, jumping out of the car and striding quickly over to Mrs. Turner’s car.

“Bax,” Nick greeted him with a wide smile.

As much as it was clear Nick was happy to see him, it was also clear that Nick was stressed and anxious. When he hugged Bax in greeting, he held on a little too tightly and pressed their bodies together a little too long.

“What’s going on here?” Bax asked when Nick finally let him go.

“My son has finally come to his senses and agreed the children should live with me,” Mrs. Turner answered for him as she approached from the house, a wailing Jordan in her arms.