Page 32 of Forged

And his mum probably knew now, too. He’d told Kate, and Kate had probably turned around and told his mum and Joann.

Shit. He’d accidentally come out to his family.

Oh God. He was gay. Well, bi. But, yeah, he had a serious thing for a man.

“Are you alright?” Bax asked after they’d been silent in the car for about ten minutes.

“Yeah,” Nick lied.

He thought about it and peeked sideways at Bax as he made the last turn that would take them back to Hawthorne House.

Bax wasn’t fooled.

“Okay, I’m not alright,” he confessed. “But I’m not bad. I’m not freaking out. I’m not.”

Bax laughed and reached over to touch his arm. “You can freak out. A lot of things just happened.”

“I didn’t come out, did I?” he asked with a wince.

Bax grinned like Nick had told a joke. Nick loved his grin. He loved his smile and his easy manner. If he was willing to let go of his fears and his assumptions about himself, he would go further to say he liked Bax’s lips, liked his body, liked the way it felt when the two of them hugged. Just one more push, and it wouldn’t have to be a strong one either, and he might just be willing to explore those feelings further.

Like, naked farther.

“Coming out isn’t necessarily some huge declaration or a super intense moment where you sit across the table from your loved ones and say, ‘Mum, I’m bisexual’,” Bax said.

Nick blinked and gripped the steering wheel harder. “Are you bisexual?”

Bax laughed loud enough to fill the car with joy. And, unfortunately, to wake the kids.

“No,” he answered as he twisted to face the trial that was Macy and Jordan waking up from their naps and finding themselves in their car seats. “You’re the bi one, love. I’m completely gay. It’s only ever been men. Give me dick over pussy any day. Hello, you two!” he finished his declaration in a childish, sing-song voice.

Nick smiled despite his anxiety. It wasn’t particularly logical, but he was relieved that Bax was just gay. That meant he had less competition for Bax’s attention.

Of course, that was ridiculous, too. Bax could pay attention to whomever he liked. It wasn’t like he didn’t have at least two other small humans that demanded his full attention most of the time anyhow.

Speaking of which, their conversation, which had seemed incredibly important, was cut short as soon as Jordan and Macy were fully awake. They were close to home anyhow, and as soon as the babies were aware of their surroundings and their captive audience of two, they demanded everything from snacks to cuddles, once they got out of the car, and kept both Nick and Bax on their toes for the remainder of the afternoon.

“Are you sure you want to stick around for supper?” Nick asked as he puttered around in the kitchen, fixing kid-appropriate chicken nuggets and chips. Vegetables, too, because he’d be damned if he turned into one of those dads who didn’t make their kids eat their vegetables. “None of this is particularly fun.”

“Of course, it’s fun,” Bax said, stepping into the kitchen to take over some of the food prep as Nick stepped away to see what had started Macy screaming in the other room.

It wasn’t. Being a father was amazing and rewarding, and he loved his kids, but taking care of two tiny humans who needed intense amounts of focus wasn’t always fun.

Bax gave it his all, though, which Nick noted and appreciated. He wasn’t a natural with children, but he was learning. Part of that day had been all about Bax learning just how much work went into parenting. Nick could tell there had been a few moments when Bax’s patience had worn thin. When Jordan threw a fit about his chips being too small, for instance.And when Macy decided it would be more fun to play with the red sauce than to eat it.

“You really don’t have to stick around for this part if you don’t want to,” Nick insisted again after supper, while cleaning up the carnage of the simple meal. He and Bax had barely been able to shovel food into their own mouths with the kids in such high spirits.

“I want to stick around,” Bax said, grinning with particular heat at Nick as he wiped Macy’s face and hands. “I can’t wait to see what comes after this bit.”

Nick’s face heated. He was curious about what might happen next, too. Everything between him and Bax felt so ripe and full of promise. His libido was dying to know what sort of mischief he could get up to, despite the fact that he still didn’t know what he was doing in that department. He hadn’t had time to look it up online, and had been far too embarrassed to ask any of the knowledgeable Hawthornes.

“After this bit comes passing out on the couch with CBeebies playing in the background,” Nick laughed.

Bax smiled at him with that look that made Nick feel like he was standing on the precipice of a whole new world.

“I’m here for it,” he said confidently.

Nick hoped that confidence would last through playing on the carpet after supper, then through bathtime. Bax bowed out of bathtime, saying he didn’t know whether it was appropriate for him to be in the same room with the kids when they were undressed. That was a can of worms that he had no idea if he was ready for. Was it appropriate? Would it be if the two of them were in some sort of serious, committed relationship? How did people navigate that fine line between stranger and family anyhow?

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