Page 2 of Broken Promises

“I wanted to sit on the roof,” I replied, her eyes narrowing.

“You’d better not jump. I’ve had enough of your drama this week, and I don’t feel like going back to prison for a secondmurder charge. I have a feeling this one would stick and they’d put me away for a lot longer this time.”

I snickered, flashing her an amused grin. “No one would miss a lowly Heights trash kid.”

“I don’t know, pretty sure the prick living in my spare bedroom would make some noise about it,” she deadpanned, following me as I started walking towards the building to let us inside.

“Don’t worry, I won’t jump. The last place I want to die is here, and my luck, I’d just bounce off the ground and end up with brain damage.”

We made our way through the halls and up to the roof, sitting on the edge and looking out into the night.

“Do you want kids?” I asked randomly, and she scrunched her nose at me as she tossed her cigarette butt over the edge, mine following.

“Right now? Fuck no. Maybe one day though. I know Jett wants kids, but Maddox is on the fence about it. I think he likes the idea of it, but logically, he knows it might be too risky. We know what it’s like to grow up within a crew environment. I wouldn’t change anything, but a little less gunfire and kidnapping would’ve been nice. I’m not sure if I want to continue the pattern, you know?”

“I know what you mean. I want kids one day when I can provide them with a stable home,” I sighed, my eyes drifting in the direction of Ashburn Valley. “If I hadn’t been attacked, I’d still be pregnant. I wouldn’t have a choice but to raise a kid in my rundown house, not knowing if I could afford to feed them. A small part of me feels guilty for being relieved that I don’t have to put them through that, but it’s also kind of destroying me at the same time that I won’t have the chance to be their mom.”

My voice broke a little, and I cleared my throat, not expecting her to reach out and pat my head like I was a puppy.

“Uh, it will be okay,” she said, not sounding confident, but I could appreciate the effort. “Do you want me to say something to make you feel better, or do you want me to give you my blunt opinion?”

“I like how blunt you are. You don’t sugarcoat shit.”

She shuffled back, obviously uncomfortable with comforting me. “It’s a good thing that it happened. You can’t feed yourself half the time, so you can’t even sacrifice your own food to a kid. You’d have to neglect their health care because you don’t even have your own insurance, you go without electricity and water regularly, and you’d become another statistic of a Heights parent whose kid is in the system because you couldn’t look after them. I’m not saying you’d be a shitty mom, but the world dealt you a shitty hand. You need to get yourself out of here and set yourself up better before raising kids.”

“That’s what I try to tell myself,” I mumbled, the pang of guilt hitting me in the chest. “Doesn’t mean I don’t feel bad about it.”

“You’re allowed to feel bad. You’re human. Diesel wanted to let you know that you don’t have to help with the foster kids if it’s going to upset you, but the offer still stands.”

“I still want to,” I replied quickly, knowing I needed the money more than ever now that I was on my own.

“You want to crash at their place tonight? I can drop you off on my way back to mine. Poppy would appreciate the help in the morning, and you’d get to avoid your dad,” she offered, and I frowned.

“How do you know I’m avoiding him?”

“Why else would you want to hang out with me at an abandoned school at almost four in the morning? It’s obvious you’re avoiding the house,” she said dryly, lying back with her legs dangling over the edge. “He’s a drunk piece of shit, right?”

I shuffled back so I could draw my knees to my chest, resting my chin on them. “Yeah. If we ever had money when I was little,it went to booze. I don’t know how we didn’t starve to death as babies. The foster system should’ve taken me and my brother away before we were even home from the hospital, to be honest. Mom was just as much of a deadbeat as Dad, they didn’t hide it. They didn’t even call it in when Josh went to the hospital for a broken arm when he was three. The neighbor took him.”

“You were abused a lot?”

“Josh more than me. He was always protecting me. When Josh died, I was both angry and relieved that Dad only came back for proof before leaving again. I was twelve, I just wanted my dad to give a shit and comfort me, but I also knew if he’d stayed, he would’ve just spent the time drunk and blaming me. Reid stepped up since Dad wouldn’t.”

“That’s a lot for him to take on as a kid himself.”

“I know. I’m pissed at him right now, but I’ll always be grateful for the sacrifices he made for me and Logan,” I said, glancing at her. “And yeah, I might crash at your parents’ place tonight. Maybe helping Poppy when I wake up will be good for me.”

“Or you’ll come back here and jump off the roof from lack of sleep and children screaming at you,” she chuckled, lighting another cigarette and blowing the smoke into the air. “Logan freaked the other night when he found out you’d gone to the Pit by yourself.”

“I’m perfectly capable of stabbing creeps or breaking noses if I’m forced to,” I answered dryly, grabbing a piece of broken glass from close by and tossing it off the roof. “I made a deal last year with Reid that if he promised not to race on the streets anymore, then I’d stop fighting for the fun of it. Logan’s probably worried I’ll get attacked with a knife again for starting shit.”

“You got stabbed in a fight?”

“I wouldn’t say stabbed, I got cut. Wasn’t that bad, but the guys freaked. So, they don’t want me fighting anymore,” I grumbled.

“You should show the world your teeth more. Fuck them. Make sure people know you’re not hiding behind any guard dogs,” she mused, staring up into the night’s sky. “I know you’re not a little bitch or anything, but people underestimate you because they think you rely on the guys to save you. You’ve got fire, I can see that, but I’ve never really seen you hold your own either.”

I smirked, accepting what was left of her cigarette as she offered it to me. “Maybe I like it that way. Let them underestimate me then see what happens when they make a move. Just because I don’t wave a gun around regularly or give people beat downs in the street anymore, doesn’t mean I can’t. I’ve always let the guys protect me because it kept the peace, and it stopped Reid and Logan going back to the street races after Reid healed.”

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