Page 139 of Always

“Even now, it surprises me how much I love you. How much I need you in my life. To be without you will be torture.”

She stands again. She tentatively reaches forward. “You don’t have to be without me.”

“Don’t you get it?” I rub furiously at my temple, easing a throbbing ache. “I have to let you go. I can’t take the chance—”

She closes the distance between us and falls into me.

“I won’t let you go,” she says against my chest. “I won’t. Irefuse.”

“Oh, Skye…” I kiss the top of her head.

She eases back and meets my gaze. “We didn’t work this hard to be together just to have it torn away from us. By Beau Reardon? By Peter and Garrett? No way, Braden. I don’t accept this. Not for a fucking minute.”

“You don’t have a choice.” I shake my head. “Neither of us does.”

“Bullshit.” She pounds her fist on my chest. “If it would truly be torture to live without me, why would you subject yourself to that?”

“For your safety.”

“I can take care of myself.”

“What if I hadn’t come tonight?”

“You did.”

“Damn it! Fight fair, Skye.”

“Why should I? You’re not.”

I level my gaze on her. “I always fight fair.”

“Not with me. It’s your way or the highway, always. Well, not tonight, Braden. We’re not in the bedroom at the moment, and this time I’m getting my way.”

The only other woman I loved this much was my mother, and I lost her. Lost her because I didn’t protect her. I’ve come to terms with that. Sort of. I was a stupid kid. But I’m a man now. A man, and it’s my duty to protect the woman I love.

I succeeded tonight, but the next time, I might not.

“I can’t lose you,” I say, my voice resigned. “Not like I lost her.”

She curls her hands into fists. “I’m not your mother, Braden.”

I sigh. “I know.”

“She made a choice. She chose you. I’m making that same choice. You want to condemn us both to torture without each other? I won’t let you.”

“I didn’t keep her safe,” I say into her hair. “I lost her.”

She pulls back and grips my shoulders. “You were six years old, for God’s sake! Are you going to hold a child to some insurmountable standard?”

“Don’t you?”

It’s a fair question. Skye is still holding herself responsible for her parents’ separation to some extent.

“No,” she says, her tone full of resolve. “Absolutely not. My parents’ separation was not my fault.”

I tilt my head. Look into her warm brown eyes. And I believe her. I believe her words with all my heart. Her journey is far from complete, but she’s moving forward. And with each step, she understands herself a little better.

“And your mother’s death was not your fault, Braden. It isn’t. It never was.”

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