Page 8 of Carnal

Her gaze never leaves mine as she steps over the threshold and angles in for a kiss.

Who the hell am I to say no?

Chapter Five

Sasha

I’ve only ever read about a kiss that stops time, and quite honestly, I thought that idea was bogus. I’ve kissed men before and never ever did reality alter. A few times, it was nice, but that’s where it ended. I didn’t see stars or butterflies. My heart didn’t skip beats, and my body didn’t tingle when his lips met mine.

Now I know I wasn’t kissing the right man.

Ryder’s rough hand lands on my throat as he twists his hat back and lands me against the frame of the door, his lips on mine like our lives depend on it. He’s careful, but strong as he growls into my mouth with something I can only guess is need.

God, I want to serve him. I’ve never wanted to serve anyone more. I want to get on my knees and pleasure him in every way possible. I want him on me, inside of me, surrounding me. I want to be the peace in his long, hard day. The woman waiting to drain his balls the second he gets home.

My clit throbs and my panties soak as his kiss deepens and his hand tightens around my throat. I might come right here, in his arms, against the frame of the door. Then all at once, he pulls away, taking my soul with him.

Our eyes meet and his breath is on my neck, warming the lobe of my ear. “Your lips are like sugar, baby.”

I can’t speak. I can barely move. I’ve waited for this moment so long that it almost doesn’t feel real.

He drags in a deep breath before running his big hand down over my shoulder and into my palm. “We should talk before we do anything we regret.”

I’d never regret any of this, but I agree, we should talk. I nod and step back into the house, closing the cabin door behind us.

I realize now that he has his toolbox and that maybe his visit wasn’t as sexual in nature as I’d thought when I swung open the door and threw myself onto him.

My cheeks heat. Did I just make an idiot out of myself?

Either way, his cock is rock hard sitting on the left side of his jeans, thick and wide. I should really have more couth. I’m a lady, I’m not supposed to be objectifying men. It’s wrong, right? That said, I can’t stop looking at his cock. I can’t stop thinking about what it would feel like spreading me wide. Clearly, judging by the size, it would hurt, but I want it to hurt.I want it to hurt so fucking good.

Ryder sets his toolbox down on the floor by the door and kicks off his boots, hanging his jacket on the hook before stepping into the house.

“Do you want some coffee? There’s a pot made, and I have a few muffins. I can—”

“No.” He steps toward me, landing his hand on my shoulder as we sit on the couch, our gaze never leaving one another. “What you said on the phone, I feel it all too. The kiss we just had, the way you orgasmed on the line, I’ll think about those things forever, but I don’t know if it can go any further, Sasha. I—”

“It’s one time, Ryder. That’s all. We do it and we see if it helps to stop the ache.”

Apparently, I’m a teenage boy in an after-school special now.

“It won’t. Trust me. I’ve had an ache for you since you were…fuck… too fuckin’ young for me to be aching for. I can’t fuck you now and not want you again and again for the rest of my life. Besides that, this feelin’ isn’t only about fuckin’ you. I want to take care of you, Sasha. I want to listen to you change your mind about what you want for dinner eighteen times a day. I want to carry you to bed when you fall asleep on the couch, and I want to hold you forever.” He brushes a hand down over my cheek and leans his elbow against the back of the couch. “Do you remember that summer you came home from college the year after your parents passed?”

I nod. “And you tacked up the biggest horse you have and took me out onto the trail by the river. We had a picnic next to the lake and you let me ramble about everything.” I glance down at my hand resting on his knee. I like it there. “I lost my scholarship that year because I couldn’t stay focused. You helped me see that wasn’t the end. You went through the Gazette with me half a dozen times until we found the job at the library, then you listened to me talk about writing all day and night, and you read every single shitty word I wrote. I fell in love with you so many times that year.”

I watch a lump slide down his throat, and I wonder if I’ve said too much.

He leans into my forehead and kisses me gently. “I love you more, baby, and you’re a great writer. You have no idea how much I want this, but the thought of having you for a second only to lose everything is too fucking much.”

“What if we don’t overthink it?” I climb up onto his lap, straddling his waist as I kiss the tip of his nose, his lips, and the lobe of his ear. “What if you just touch me and I touch you, andwe let our bodies explore? We can disappear right here in this cabin, let time stop for us… even if it’s just for tonight.”

He smiles wide and holds his hands at my waist, rubbing up my back and down again. “And we both know that if I do that, I’ll be back seven days a week for more. You’re a keeper kind of girl.”

I drag in a heavy breath and lean my head against his shoulder, breathing in the cedar on his skin.

“Mason wants to get back together with ya. He came home last night for good.”

I lean up and stare toward him. “What? He never mentioned anything about coming back.”

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