Page 32 of Loving Decker

She sighed.

“And maybe.” Decker gritted his teeth. “Maybe he brought the developer.”

She nodded. “Maybe. I ask myself that all the time.”

“And we’re here. We’re healthy right now.”

“But there’s no guarantee of that, is there? There’s nowhere that says if you’re a good person, or if God loves you enough, He’s gonna take away your problems.”

“No, that’s true.” Decker really scrambled for a moment. He wasn’t sure what to tell her, because she was right. They had trials. They might get worse ones. When you looked at it like that, why pray at all? Then his mama’s sweet face came into his mind. And he remembered her words. “But I know He hears us.”

She sniffed.

“And He loves us. He will show us that. We will feel it.”

When she didn’t respond, he added. “And He really does make things work out for our good.”

She looked away.

“Sometimes our good looks pretty hard on the outside. But it has lots of goodness on the inside. Like your éclairs.”

She snorted.

He nudged her. “Sorry. We’re trying to be serious here.”

“My éclairs are not tough on the outside.”

The he laughed. “No, you’re right. I’m sorry. They’re light and fluffy. Is that what they’re supposed to be?”

“Oh stop. Yes. They’re fluffy and tasty and full of delicious cream on the inside.”

“Right. That’s the part I’m talking about. He makes it okay. Whatever we have to deal with, he makes it okay. And sometimes, there’s a sweetness there that we see right away.”

She swallowed and nodded. “And sometimes not, but He does work things out for our good.” She seemed more sure of the idea.

“I believe that. But I don’t know about your grandpa. If we wait just a few weeks more, one day more, one hour more, will it be enough for him to open his eyes and talk to us?”

She wilted and fell forward on the horse, wrapping her arms around the front of Electric. It couldn’t have been too comfortable over the top of the saddle horn, but she stayed there.

Then he hopped down and tugged at her to come down with him. “Come here, you.”

She slid off and fell into his arms. “I’m sorry I’m so pathetic. It’s just so much. And riding across the land just now, thinking about Grandpa, it was more than I could do.”

“You got me. I’m here.” He pulled her close and held her tight. “I wish you didn’t have to even think about something like this.”

“Me neither.”

They stood like that for a long time. The breeze felt comforting. It carried smells and memories and thoughts of his house and hers, mingling together around them. Then he nudged her. “Hey.”

She looked up into his face. Her tears were dried. And she seemed at peace. “Let’s talk about this. What do we know about people who wake up? ’Cause there’s no reason why he can’t be the miracle, right?”

“True, but…”

“I mean, we pray, we sit by him, read him his favorite books, tell him problems to solve, get him actively thinking again…” She didn’t seem to be energized by any of his ideas.

She just shook her head. “I think that’s all great, but I sort of think this might be it.” She shuddered as a lingering sob trembled through her, but then she smiled. “I feel more peaceful than I have in a long time.”

He nodded. “But we don’t know for sure, right?”

---