Page 24 of Coming Home to Maverick

“Come on. It can’t be as bad as all that.”

But the look she gave him made him wonder.

They made their way back to the truck and hopped inside. He pulled out his flannel blanket from behind the seat and handed her a thermos. “Hot chocolate.”

“Of course, you brought the hot cocoa.”

He turned the truck on for a moment to get the heat going, and then he twisted in his seat so that he was facing her. “You know, having you back is doing crazy things with my emotions.”

Her eyes widened. “Mine too.”

“Like this right here. How many times have we sat across from each other in this truck? I see you over there, an adult, a mother, but my mind remembers us as teenagers, as college kids, engaged…”

Her face pinched in pain, but he couldn’t spare her the truth. If he was ever going to understand what happened, to have some closure, he would need answers. And frankly, he deserved them.

“I don’t know where to start.” Her gaze flitted to his and then away, but he just waited. Finally, she cleared her throat and hugged herself. “I know nothing I say will make it right. So I hope you’re not over there thinking I have some magical reason for being a terrible person. Understanding won’t make it easier not to hate me.” She shook her head. “I know that nothing I could say is good enough. There would never be a good enough reason for what I did to you, to my parents, to Gracie.” She choked on her daughter’s name and looked away. “But you deserve to know that I loved you. I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you and forever after. I didn’t leave because I wanted to run away fromyou.”

He nodded, not quite sure he believed her. But he hoped what she said was true.

“I don’t know, Maverick. Here’s what I think happened. I looked at our lives, looked at you and all that you had going for you. Rodeo star, circuit after circuit. You were the world champion that year, remember? I couldn’t take that away from you.”

“What are you talking about? Why would you—”

“I’ll explain, Maverick. I wasn’t happy.”

He tried to ignore his pain at those words. He’d worried for years that he hadn’t been enough for her, that he hadn’t made her happy.

“Everything with you was perfect, but I wanted more. I was selfish. I wanted a career of my own, in music. I wanted people shoutingmyname. You had a world record. I wanted a piece of that too.”

“What do you mean? Like, as a singer?”

“Yes, I know that sounds ridiculous.”

He opened his mouth, but she talked over him.

“Especially now that I know what an epic failure I was. But at the time, I looked around at this beautiful town, at all these lovely people, my family, your family, and I wanted more.

“I was gonna ask you if we could take off for a year and live in Nashville so I could see where this went. But then you got your record and signed that deal to ride the circuit for two more years.”

He nodded. “I should have talked to you first.”

“You did. We talked about it, remember? Right here in this truck. And when you showed me the contract, when you had that light in your eyes and I knew I was witnessing your dream coming true, I couldn’t say anything but ‘go for it.’”

He should have pushed, asked her questions. He’d been so completely dizzy with excitement at his new fame he hadn’t bothered to really make sure she was on board.

“And then someone called me. A man named Daniel. He said he’d represent me, help me make it big, introduce me to producers. But I had to go to Nashville right then. There was a group of producers looking for a new talent. And Daniel said if we didn’t leave soon, I would miss my window.”

“So you went.”

“I went. He offered me a room at his place, and I never left.”

“And Gracie?”

“He’s her father.”

Maverick nodded. He didn’t know what to say. If he said what he was actually thinking, he might never be able to take it back. “Did you love him?

“That’s not a fair question.”

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