Page 16 of The Spy

“Oh, he’s good. I trained him myself.”

“We shall best him, but later. How about a walk along the water?”

“Wonderful!” They exited out the back doors and took to one of the many paths that led their way around the palace and off to the ocean. The glorious blue green stretch of water almost circled the palace, which sat on a peninsula.

Lucan reached for her hand. “If you look east, you can imagine Torren, right over there.” He pointed.

She turned to him. “I often do. When the sun is setting I stare out over the ocean and try to guess where you might be, watching it too.”

“And when it rises, I think of you.” He squeezed her hand. “Is this really happening? You? Me? Doing something as simple as walking along a path?”

“Can you bear it, do you think?” She asked the question that most worried her. She dreaded the moment he would once again feel pulled to help someone somewhere around the world and then be sucked back into his old life. Her life as monarch couldn’t sustain such activity in her husband. He would bring a danger to the crown that was irresponsible of her to introduce and he would not be present as a unified couple for the country of Spain. She waited, mentally crossing her fingers, to hear his response.

“Anything at all is worth the time spent with you. I realized, when I was away this last time, that I needed to leave that world behind. And what I wanted most was simply, you. Whatever your life is, that is what I want. If it means, taking on matters of state at your side, then so be it. If it means playing hooky from your extraordinarily capable Barlow, then I’m game for that too. I realized in the slums of Thailand that all I want, is you.”

She knew where he could go with that sentence, but she watched him stop himself, restrain his words, but his eyes showed it all. Commitment, love, hope, he offered her it all. And she would have scooped it up had he asked her to, but she was grateful for some time to ease into their new life. She knew he wanted all of those things, but she wasn’t sure he could live the quiet life. Though, palace life was hardly quiet. She had left her phone on her office desk and she knew, even now, it was filling with all sorts of requests on her time.

But moments with Lucan were important. And moments with him were also matters of state, she reminded herself. After all, she was improving relations with their future king. She stopped her breath. And hoped what she just thought was true.

“What are you smiling about?” Lucan turned his slate grey eyes to her.

“I was just thinking how nice you look here.”

“I love to be here. Tell me about your last mission.”

Her heart twinged. “I had to cut it short. Left Egypt to be with my mom.”

“Did they complete it? Send someone else in?”

“They did. And it worked out more or less. Bad guys are captured, good guys freed…”

“But?”

She hated to think about the mission. “But…there were some casualties I possibly could have avoided.”

Lucan’s hand tightened on her own. “You can’t go there. What-ifs..might have beens.” He ran a thumb along the top of her knuckles. “If given the chance to do it all over again, you’d do the same.”

“True. I would. Those last few hours with my mom ended up being just that, hours. If I had delayed, I would have lost that time. Her face when I came in.” She swallowed, didn’t want to continue. Her face pinched.

“I’m sorry. I’m so sorry, Anna. I wanted nothing more than to be with you.”

She turned into his arms and cried. Not big heaving sobs. She had cried most of those out, but the last few tears, her body had seemed to be saving for Lucan. The tears she wished she could have cried on his shoulder. “She was a wonderful, kind Queen.”

“And you will be the same.”

She shook her head. “I will be different.”

“And that’s ok too.”

She nodded. “I know it is. I miss her. I miss the man my father was when he had her at his side. Seeing a spouse lose another, I see the strength of marriage. I see the purpose in it. And I want that strength at my side.” She turned to him. Could he be that man? Did he have it in him to put the crown, her crown, first?

The intensity of his return stare said he wanted to. “Come on.” He kicked his shoes across the sand and took off at a run across the beach.

She unstrapped her heels and did the same, shouting after him.

They raced down the sand where it was wet and hard and slightly crunchy beneath their feet. Crabs scurried back into their holes, waves seeped in and out, leaving rounded marks of water in its wake. The wind whipped through their clothes and Anna gloried in the beauty all around them. She caught up with Lucan, and he held her in his arms, swinging her around. Then he headed for the water. “What? Lucan! It’s not exactly warm.”

“Oh no? Let’s check it out.”

---