Page 83 of The Passion

Not everyone, but in big business, it’s cutthroat.

“I need to do this on my own.” I can see the disappointment in his eyes but shortly followed by understanding.

“I wish you didn’t have to, but I get it. Tell me how I can help you do that, though.”

I can’t have any more respect for this man than I do right now. He knows he has to take a step back, which goes against his protective nature that I have seen in him from the moment my life started imploding. But still, he wants to help me in any way he can.

“I have no idea, except to just keep being you and picking me up every time I fall. I’m hoping that won’t be too many more times, but I would be stupid to think it’s not going to happen at all.”

“I will always be here, but I think you underestimate yourself. I just give you the space to take a breath and you stand up again all by yourself, just like you have been doing all your life, from what I can work out.”

Flynn is such a contradiction from what I thought he was like before I really knew him. Being a womanizer, you assume he is also a man who would always want to be in control of awoman. Yet he is the opposite. Letting me be the woman I am and encouraging me to continue with how I want to lead the life that I have created for myself.

Hearing him encouraging me to do what I need to do has my heart beating louder for him.

“Thank you.” It’s all that needs to be said. We drive in silence for a while, and then we fall into just random conversation because I think Flynn can tell that’s what I need.

Eventually we get closer to the center of the city where we both live, and he looks across to me.

“Where am I taking you now, to your father’s or home with me, now that there is no need to hide our relationship?”

“I think I might like to go home on my own for a while if that’s okay. I just need to get my head together and curl up in my own bed, taking some time to just feel sorry for myself.” The scowl on his face tells me he is not happy with that answer.

“I don’t think that’s a good idea. Besides, I have a very comfy bed you can crawl into with me.” I know Flynn means well, but it’s not what I want.

“I know that, but I just want to be on my own. It’s nothing to do with you, Flynn, it’s just what I need.” I’m almost pleading with him not to make this a big deal.

“What I’m more worried about is your father turning up at your apartment. To be honest, he could already be there. I think it’s a good idea for you to be able to speak to him somewhere that you can choose to leave, but if he arrives at your apartment then it’s harder to kick him out. And I’m not there to protect you, and I’m not fucking okay with that!” His voice escalates to the point that the frustration that he has been trying to hold in all day is now escaping.

“I don’t need protecting! I’m a grown-ass woman who can protect herself from her own father, even if he is the worst person I know!” Now I’m the one losing my temper, and tobe honest, I don’t have the energy fight with Flynn, while also fending off the other men in my life.

“But you shouldn’t have to!” He smacks his hand down on the steering wheel.

And that’s the problem.

Flynn doesn’t doubt me and is constantly showing me respect, but it will never stop him from wanting to be there for me. Not to overrun me, but to support me.

I reach across and put my hand softly on his cheek, trying to soothe him.

“I know, but this is how it is. If I don’t stand up to him now, then I will forever appear weak to every man I do business with. And whether we like it or not, the world is watching this from the outside.” Stroking my thumb over his skin, I can feel him dropping his head into my hand, taking the comfort I offer.

“I know,” he says, but I can tell his jaw is still clenched as I take my hand away. And to be honest, I’m not sure where he is driving us to until we are just a few moments from my apartment building, and he pulls the Audi into the visitor’s parking spot.

“Can I at least come up with you to make sure he isn’t waiting inside? And then I’ll leave. As long as you promise to tell the security at the front desk that no one is allowed up to your apartment, including your father.” Obviously, Flynn is not letting the concern about my father rest.

“Including you?” I tease, trying to break the tension with a little humor, but it’s not working.

“Not a chance, I need to be able to get to you if you need me. So, you can try to put me on your exclusion list, but nobody would hold me back. I’m going to respect you and stay away, but don’t be stupid and put yourself in danger. Promise me.” The way he is looking at me now is almost a plea to give him this one request.

“Okay.” Leaning across the car, I take his face between my hands and give him the softest kiss on the lips, resting my forehead on his and just staying in the moment.

“Thank you,” he whispers.

After we spoke to the security at the front desk and Flynn escorted me upstairs, satisfied that I was okay, he reluctantly left me on my own.

I ignored calls from my father, messaged Harper that I wanted to be left alone unless it was urgent, and then called my mother. She wasn’t happy about everything that has happened overnight and wanted to come over and make sure I was alright. It took a while, but I assured her that I’m coping and the best thing she could do for me was to just give me a night alone to gather my thoughts.

I drowned my worries and let the tears run in a long hot bath. After, I curled into a ball in my dressing gown on my bed for a few hours, just staring into nothing, and eventually fell into a restless nap. Which is so unlike me, I never sleep during the day, but the mental strain of the last few days has just taken every bit of energy I had. Waking, I knew I had to get up and do something. I’ve given myself time to wallow in my own misery, and now it’s time to pull myself together and get on with it.