Page 38 of The Passion

Flynn: Hard… No fun. Good night.

And like I have done many nights before this, my hand slips down under the covers and finds my very hard cock that I wrap with my fist and jerk off to visions of her here with me.

“I now pronounce you husband and wife. You may kiss your bride,” the celebrant announces, and there is no holding Nic back from claiming his bride with what some might say is a near X-rated kiss.

Can’t blame the man. He has waited a long time for this, and being his friend for what feels like forever, I couldn’t be happier for him. He carried so much hate and anger around for most of his life, and it took a strong woman to crack his shell. But since Tori walked into his life, he has grown into the man he was always meant to be.

I never thought I would be jealous of him getting married, because I had declared to him so many times over the years as we lived together in Australia that I would never be the settling down kind of man. But seeing him in this moment, part of mestarts to long for it more than I ever thought possible for my stone heart.

“Time for a drink, gentlemen.” Slapping both Rem and Forrest on the shoulders, I head toward the bar that is set up to the side of the ceremony on the beach before we head into the resort for the reception.

“Now that’s a plan I can get on board with.” Forrest is beside me as we walk out of the sun and look for something cold to quench our thirst.

We may only have mildly cold beer in England, but here in the country that will fry your skin on a cloudy day, the beer needs to be ice-cold to give it the full benefit of enjoyment.

Taking the first sip of beer, this cold always reminds me of the years spent in Australia. Life was simple then. Nic and I didn’t have any money, but we worked hard and loved our life here. Not that I don’t love my life now, but it’s so different, in fact the total opposite. We have more money than we know what to do with, especially Nic, and a lifestyle we only ever dreamed of.

Yet I still just can’t seem to find that place I fit.

“Always thought you would be the first one of us to get married,” I say, looking at Forrest who is standing next to me under the shade of a tree.

“Well, lucky you aren’t a betting man, isn’t it.” Both of us let out a chuckle. “Mum has been hinting hard enough that she thinks it time I ‘found’ someone to marry. Like it’s that fucking easy.” He rolls his eyes.

“What, the golden boy isn’t as perfect as she was hoping, married to the perfect wife, with the perfect two children, boy and a girl, the home with the token pet, and all round just the perfect life.” I know Mum doesn’t mean to be hurtful, but I get sick of listening to how much she would love some grandchildren like all her friends have.

“Fuck off. Nothing perfect about me, and you can always be the one to fulfill her wishes, you know.” Forrest bumps his shoulder against mine.

Thoughts are racing through my head of what my life would look like if I could ever get Felisha to look at me as more than just the guy she slept with a few times.

Would she ever want kids? I don’t know if that would be in the life she pictures for herself. If not, could I live a life without children? Although I only recently started to think about wanting a different life and imagined kids in that, would it be a deal breaker for me?

My honest answer is I don’t know.

But what I do know is you would be surprised what I would sacrifice to find out.

I mingle with the other guests and catch up with a few of our friends from living in Australia that I haven’t seen for a few years. The night has got away from us, and the four of us our now standing in the reception room together, to the side of the dance floor, watching Tori, Elouise, and Blaise dancing up a storm with the biggest smiles on their faces.

A sense of being watched washes over me, and as I glance at the door, my stomach drops in shock but also instant concern.

“What the fuck is she doing here?” slips from my lips before I have time to think.

This is the third time I have seen Felisha appear at my doorstep, not looking like her usual completely fashionably perfect self. She waves shyly at me to come to her.

Shit.

Something is wrong.

“I’ll go,” Rem’s stern voice comes from beside me as he is about to march across the room.

“No! This is my mess. Let me be the one to sort out the next chapter. Apparently, my life is not just a news story but a fucking novel with way too many plot twists for my liking.”

Storming across the room as fast as I can without causing a scene, I’m wondering who I need to take down.

Because for her to show up here and be looking like she is, someone has hurt her, and when I find out who it is, I will happily destroy them for her.

“Felisha, what are you doing here, what’s wrong?” Taking her by the hand, I lead her outside to a quiet place where the palm trees are gently blowing in the sea breeze and the moonlight is reflected softly on the water.

“I’m sorry. I’m so sorry. I didn’t know what else to do. You told me where the wedding was just in case something happened, and I didn’t want to give away the secret, but I just felt so lost and needed you.” She can’t hold her tears back, and I can’t help but pull her into my arms, letting her sob freely but also to feel safe doing it.

---