Page 101 of Giddy Up, Daddy

“It’s too early to freeze. I’m sure Nick can hold out against the battle cow for a few more minutes if you want to change?” Unlike her, he had a whole drawer full of them from his foreman days.

He hesitated and then shook his head. “Naw, better to get down there before they cause more damage, and I still have to set up the coffee.”

Charlie shrugged. “Don’t blame me when you turn into a Sam-cicle.”

A few minutes later they were both trotting over crunchy grass, heading down to the barn. She’d have preferred to take thetruck… but Sam was afraid it would startle the cow, and send it barreling off in its metal cage, destroying everything in its path.

They could hear Nick cursing before they got to him. Most of it was R-rated, but as they got there, he’d switched to pleading with her. “Bessie, you have got to be the stupidest fucking piece of beef I have ever had the misfortune to run into. Will you please let me help you?”

Charlie and Sam both stopped short, staring. It was an amazing sight, and probably worth getting up before dawn to see.

The feeder wasn’t small or especially light. It was a good eight feet in diameter and made of galvanized steel. It was meant to surround one of the big round hay bales, so the cattle could feed without ruining half of it under their feet. It was pretty sturdy and could put up with a lot of pushing as the hungry cows crowded around it.

But somehow…somehowthis oversized heifer had managed to get in the middle of it. And then she’dmanaged to get her head stuck between the bars. Charlie had been joking when she called it a battle cow, but she hadn’t been far off.

Every time she moved, the metal feeder banged into something, and inside the barn Charlie could hear the horses kicking up a fuss. None of it was quiet, and she wasn’t surprised it had woken Nick.

Their foreman was doing his best to get her head free, but the cow sure wasn’t helping. Instead of staying still, she shook her head and swung the feeder in a wide circle. It knocked him back and hit the side of the barn with another clang. “Stop that, you cantankerous fucker! I swear you’re going to be hamburgers if you don’t quit it.”

His shouting had the other cows scattering every which way, and Charlie could barely contain the laughter that wanted to spill out of her. It had to be the most hilarious thing she’d seen inan age, and only Nick’s obvious frustration as he struggled kept her from letting out the belly laughs.

Sam didn’t bother. It began with a snort but escalated until he was holding onto the corral fence to stay upright. After that, there was no way Charlie could keep hers in. She could feel tears of amusement freezing on her cheeks.

“Oh, ha-fucking-ha, you two. You just going to stand there hee-hawing like a pair of drunk mules, or are you going to fucking help?”

“I—I just… how?” Charlie managed the few words between giggles.

The cow bellowed a protest as Nick put his weight on the metal cage to keep her from following the other cattle.

“I don’tknowhow,” Nick snapped. “But judging by the amount of barbed wire she’s dragging, I’m guessing she pulled half the fence line down. We’re going to be out there all day rounding up these assholes.”

As Nick leaned down to untangle a strand of barbed wire, the cow snapped her tail and caught him right across the cheek. He snarled, “I willeatyou right fucking now!” and pulled back in a hurry. “In this cold we’re going to lose some if we don’t find them all fast.”

That wiped away the humor pretty quickly and Sam straightened and moved to help. There were always losses over the winter, for various reasons, but there was a lean margin between profit and loss. They couldn’t afford to add to the usual numbers.

“I’ll round these guys up and herd them into the corral for now.” She left the men to deal with Battle Bessie. The cow didn’t seem bothered by her new accessory, but she didn’t like that she couldn’t wander, and Charlie doubted she’d be much help.

The stragglers didn’t give her much trouble, not once she grabbed some dried apple chunks to tempt them to follow. Butevery time shethoughtshe had them all locked up, another would wander into sight making plaintive lowing sounds. It kept her busy until long after the cold had numbed her.

And still Nick and Sam hadn’t managed to free the leader from her armor. She leaned against the fence to watch as the cow continued to frustrate them. “Is there anything I can do?” she asked, when they paused.

Sam cursed and kicked at a clump of snow. “She’s stubborn. I’d swear she wants to keep it on.”

Charlie laughed. “Maybe she does. It’s probably the most entertaining thing to happen all month.” Cattle, she’d learned, could be curious, playful creatures. If there was any way for them to get into trouble, they would find it.

Nick snorted and rubbed a gloved hand over his messy hair. “It’s going to injure her if we don’t get her out—hell, it’s already caused me a few.” He scowled at the cow, who seemed to understand him and turned suddenly to swing the feeder into his shin. “Fucker!” he bellowed as he hopped back.

Charlie choked back a laugh. “Speaking of injuries. I’ll, uh, go check on the horses before one of them breaks a leg with all the kicking.” It was a good excuse to disappear, because it had the benefit of being true.

Horses didn’t like sudden or unexpected noises, especially at night. They’d all be wide awake and restless, waiting for a human to come and fix the problem. But Charlie wasn’t going to open the big double doors and let all the heat out. She slipped in the side and announced her presence in a low calming voice.

“Good morning, ladies and gentlehorses. We’re sorry for the disturbance outside interrupting your sleep, but I’m going to make it worth it,” she promised as she kept up a continuous chatter. The sound of her voice soothed them.

Having a human in the barn, talking and visible, eased a lot of their nervousness. Then she started doling out the specialwinter treats she’d just made the week before. The molasses and cinnamon smell instantly grabbed their attention, and they lost all interest in the chaos happening outside the barn.

“I know you don’t care about this, but the oats, flax and chunks of apple make them pretty healthy. The molasses and honey will give you some extra calories. I bet you could use those with all the fussing you’ve been doing,” she explained in a sing-song voice as she moved down the rows.

They didn’t understand or care, of course, but she didn’t have much else to chatter about as they snatched the sticky balls from her hands. It was basically horse candy, and they all loved a little treat. She gave her favorites, including her personal mount, Carousel, a little extra, whispering, “Don’t tell the others.”

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