Page 96 of The Lies We Steal

After the office, after the sex, after the aftermath. The torment of her dead rat wasn’t necessary. I had enough on her that if she wanted to talk, I’d ruin her. So it wasn’t a big deal that I returned the dumb rodent.

I should’ve killed it to begin with, it would have been easier than buying supplies and food for the damn thing. A fucking thing that bit me within the first three days I had it in my dorm room.

I’d had a full-on argument with the white rat, while Thatcher was in class about how it better get its shit together or I was gonna let my roommate really skin it. I hadn’t lied when I said I let Thatcher skin an animal, a squirrel I think. That’s what we used for the note on their dorm door.

“Now we have our hands clean of each other.” She finishes, waiting for me to take the jewelry from her. “You go your way and I’ll go mine.”

I almost wanted to laugh, our hands clean of each other?

We’d done quite the opposite in that closet. I’d dirtied my hands and cock with her. My fingers, my lips, they were covered in her smell. The shower after had only made my dick hard. Standing under the burning hot stream of water, her scent rolling off me into the mist making it that much easier to fuck my hand.

I was stained with her.

There was no getting clean.

Not now.

“You know what people here see when they look at you, Briar?”

The question takes both of us off guard.

She recoils, rolling her eyes at me, “I can’t wait to hear this,”

I lean my neck towards her, sweeping a piece of her hair behind her ear as I let my eyes glide down her slender throat, towards her shoulder where my teeth marks probably lay.

“Nothing. They see nothing,” I mutter.

Her reaction is warranted, the way she swats my hand away, sucking her teeth and standing in a defensive position already regretting coming here to try and offer an olive branch.

“That’s so sweet of you, Alistair. Really, thank you for reminding me of what a piece of shit you are.”

I let her walk away from me, just enough for her to feel better about herself, before following after her. My pace steady, knowing I’ll catch her eventually.

“They see trash,” I continue, “A castoff.”

These words seem to push her faster until she’s swinging around the banister, about to head down the steps. I follow close behind, so that she’ll hear every single word I say.

“A girl from a nowhere town who doesn’t belong here. An invisible girl with no purpose, no future.”

My words are harsh.

But they are honest.

The teachers don’t look at her with potential like they do other students. They look at her as if she’s already made it as far as she’ll ever go in life. Just her being here is enough. They don’t see her as intelligent or talented.

They barely even see her.

She spins abruptly, frustration and pain twinkling in her eyes. Even though she’s stopped, I don’t. I continue to pursue her, step by step, until she’s pressed into the front of my body.

Until her back is on the wall and I can smell her.

“I just wanted this to be over, Alistair. Why are you telling me this? Why are you still doing this?” There is a crack in her voice as she searches my eyes for answers.

I keep my jaw set, my face impassive. There is nothing for her to see inside of me.

“Can I tell you something?” I ignore her questions completely.

“No.”

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