Page 87 of A Killing Cold

“Why’d you come here?” he asks me.

“What do you mean?” My mouth is so dry the words come out broken.

He waves a hand. “Connor. This trip. What was the plan?”

My breath is ragged. I wish I could sit up, but my muscles feel like taffy. “No plan.”

“Seems reckless.”

“I didn’t know who I was. I didn’t know any of it. There was no plan.”

“Then it’s what, it’s fate?” he says. He laughs, tips his head back against the wall. “Well, that’s a fucking head trip.”

“No kidding,” I rasp out.

He slams the side of his fist against the wall. “Bad fucking luck. That’s it?” he says, looking at me like I’ve got answers. “You really didn’t know.”

I shake my head, which sets it pounding.

“So if you and Connor don’t meet, if he doesn’t fall head over heels like an idiot, none of this happens,” he says. “I bet you wish you’d never laid eyes on him.”

I should. Olena is dead. I’m sure I’m about to follow. But I can’t wish Connor out of my life. It’s not because of Connor that I’m here, with my hands tied in front of me. It’s because of Nick.

“What are you going to do to me?” I ask.

He lets out a breath, looking off to the side with an expression of consideration. “That’s the question, isn’t it? We can’t exactly let you go.”

“You could.”

“No. We really can’t.” He has the gall to look regretful.

I try to draw enough spit to swallow, get rid of the taste of the rag, but the combination of the gag and the drugs have left my mouth feeling gummy. “You killed Olena, didn’t you.”

“That was an accident,” he says at once.

I scoff. “Meaning she fell? Or meaning it was supposed to be me?” I ask. I flex my wrists subtly, testing the restraints. They’re far too sturdy for me to snap. I hunch, pressing my elbow against my torso, and feel the hard lump of the knife in my pocket. Good. I’m not out of options yet.

His head cocks. “I convinced myself I was going crazy. I really did. Up until I was stitching you up, and you were still asking those questions. But it was impossible. I saw you die.”

“I remember.” The face in the glow of the cigarette as the cold closed in—it was Nick. Standing in the dark. Just waiting for me to die.

“He never told me, you know,” Nick goes on. “That you weren’t really dead. That he spirited you away. Thought he could handle the whole thing by himself and we wouldn’t find out what he’d done.”

“Your father, you mean,” I say.

He makes a noise in the back of his throat. “I get it. Save the cute little kid. Who wouldn’t want to? So he bundles you off and finds you a new home and that’s that. Problem solved, conscience clear. But then you came back.”

Did Magnus recognize me right away when Connor called, said he’d be bringing his fiancée, sent pictures? He must have known that if I came here, everything would come to light. What I saw. What he’d done, sparing me. So he tried to warn me off.

“Of course, you’re not a cute little kid anymore,” Nick is saying. “He did finally come to his senses. You’re lucky your fiancé is such a shit hunter, you know. He saved your life with that fuck-up.”

The flash of metal in the woods. Mr. Vance with his rifle. And Magnus, giving me one last chance to leave before he told me where to go. Where to wait. “Trouble with poachers,” I say.

“It would have been easy enough to pin the blame on some trespassing hunter. I’ll give him credit for the plan. But he should have fuckingtoldme. He should have trusted me, but he was too worried about me finding out about his little moment of conscience. If I’d known, I could have kept Connor well away, but no. Instead my genius nephew blunders into the middle of it. It spooked you. You were going to leave, and it was obvious you weren’t just going to slink off quietly, whatever Dad had hoped. So yes, once I realized what was really going on, I decided to take care of things. She had the same coat. She was where you were supposed to be. It’s unfortunate. She was a sweet girl. Not too bright, but sweet.” He gives a flick of his hand, likeWhat can you do?

“I can tell you feel just awful,” I say.

“Would me feeling guilty bring her back? No? Then why bother,” he says. “You learn being a doctor, when you make mistakes, sometimes someone dies. You can’t spend the rest of your life agonizing over it. You learn your lesson and you move on.”

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