Page 46 of Between the Lines

Iwas.

And now, I was starting to get an inkling that maybe things between Shaw and I weren’t as dead as I’d previously thought, but I wasnottrying to make a fool of myself if I was wrong.

Again.

So I was asking the person who’d beenright—my brother.

“You really think a year is enough to make a difference?” he asked, leaning back in his chair and striking up a casual back-and-forth sway.

“I…think I’m still learning, and maturing,” I admitted. “But I definitely think I’m in abetterplace. And I don’t want to sit around waiting while someone else decides he’s a catch and makes their move.”

Pierre hiked an eyebrow. “Ohhh, so isthatwhat it really is? You’re scared somebody is gonna get him first—scared Stella is gonna spin the block?”

“Fuck Stella,” was my immediate response, accompanied by an eyeroll. Instead of letting the shit rest, she’dstillbeen making little shady posts all over social media, but Chloe had been in my ass about responding.

Keeping me from responding.

“When you join in on a clown’s performance, what does that make you?”

Ugh.

“You say that, but does Shaw feel the same?” Pierre asked, and it was easy for me to counter with a nod.

“Hehatesthis kind of thing. The pettiness and drama. He’s a lowkey guy. He just wants…peace.”

Pierre snorted. “And you think you’re ready to be that, instead of a problem?”

“I’m ready to try—as long as he’s doing the same,” I added, to which Pierre sucked his teeth.

“That was never really the issue in the first place though, was it?”

I flopped back down into a seat. “Nooo,” I had to admit. “I mean…honestly, he could probably be better at communicating and all that, but…I’m woman enough now to admit…Iwas the drama.”

“That’s big.” Pierre nodded. “I think that does a long way toward your supposed ‘readiness’ to give things another shot, but honestly, El…it’s either gonna work or it’s not.” He shrugged. “If you want to try it again…just try.”

“But what ifhedoesn’t want to?”

“Then he doesn’t, and you’ll have to be okay with that. And youwillbe okay with that. It’ll probably sting, yeah, but…shit happens. Might not want to approach it until after the show is done though,” he advised. “’Cause that would be awkward.”

An understatement, probably.

It was weird enough trying to manage my bodily reactions in intimate scenes now that we were on good terms—I couldn’t even imagine trying to perform with him fresh off arejection. So, it was easy to take Pierre’s advice to heart—not necessarilybottling my feelings, but certainly not broaching the topic with Shaw.

Not even on late-night phone calls when he said things likeanything for you, Ellie.

Like.

How was I supposed to take that?

Ugh.

Pierre was right.

It made more sense to focus on just being in a good place again, and whatever else came…we’d roll with it.

“Hey—whatdoes that look like to you?” Shaw asked, with a subtle head nod toward where Vanessa and Alec were standingveryclose, speakingveryanimatedly about something.

I glanced around, taking in my other co-stars, plus the staff and crew forKinfolk. This little celebration was very casual, everybody lowkey, exhausted from the day of shooting. Those two definitely looked more involved in a much deeper conversation than anybody else.