CHAPTER SEVEN

JEFF

I pace.

As I walk back and forth around Axel’s living room, the moment we’d shared plays over and over in my head. I’d kissed him. I’d kissed Axel right on the lips. And he didn’t seem to mind it at first. He seemed to enjoy it.

Fuck, his lips had felt so good against my own. They’d felt like they were exactly where they should be. And then he pulled away.

Axel had kissed me and then immediately regretted it.

I’ve had bad dates. I’ve had my fair share of shitty hook ups. I’m no stranger to rejection. So why the fuck does this one hurt so badly? Why does it feel like my unbeating heart is being literally ripped from my chest? Why can’t I stop thinking about that kiss?

I rub tiredly at my eyes, trying to shake this feeling. What the fuck is happening? Is this a vampire thing? Will every emotion feel like I can barely swallow them down? Will everything from here on out be pain and guilt and overwhelming?

There’s a knock at the door and I spin around, my eyes finding the door. Without my permission, my fangs drop and there’s a barely there hiss leaving my lips. I take a deep breath and my body locks up. I know that smell. I know that scent.

I rush to the door in the blink of an eye, just barely keeping myself from ripping the door open. I look through the peephole, my chest loosening with relief as I see Cooper there.

“I told you to just leave the supplies at the door.”

“I know what you said but I wanted to see you.”

“I cannot open this door, Cooper. I can’t. I don’t want to accidentally hurt you.”

Cooper sets down a large box, crossing his arms over his chest. “You’re really worried about hurting me? Fuck, Jeff. I know you’d never hurt me. Never.”

“I wanna believe that. I really do. But I can’t guarantee that.”

“Because you’re a vampire.”

It’s not a question. I lean my forehead against the door. Fuck. How did this all get so fucking jumbled up? How did everything get so complicated? I used to fight evil. And now I’m a monster.

“Yes,” I tell him, the word coming out in a choked gasp. “Yeah, Cooper. I’m a vampire.”

There’s a long pause where everything goes still before Cooper is clearing his throat. I look through the peephole again, preparing myself to see a sneer of disgust but instead I find a look of understanding.

“I’m glad you’re okay, Jeff. Truly. We’ll get through this, okay? We’re a family. We stick together and we fight not only side by side but also for each other.”

I swallow around the lump in my throat, pushing back tears. Can I even cry anymore? Does my body still produce tears? I have no idea and that uncertainty brings a broken sob rushing out of my throat.

“Thank you,” I grit out through clenched teeth. “I love you guys. Please make sure the team is up to speed and please stay on the lookout and don’t go anywhere alone. The vampire who did this to me is still at large.”

Cooper nods his head, gently touching the door. He can’t see me but I still place my hand on the door the same way. I love my team. I love that they’re the family who’s chosen me the same way I picked them. With them behind me, I know I can do this, I know I can learn to tame the hunger and learn self-control. Their strength leads me on.

“We’ll stay on this hunt until it’s taken care of,” Cooper promises me. “Take care of yourself, bossman. We need our leader, alright?”

“I promise,” I tell him seriously.

I wait until I can no longer smell Cooper before I open the door and grab the box he’s left me. I bring it into Axel’s room, closing the door behind me. No, I'm absolutely not hiding from him. Nope. Not at all. I just want to give him his space for when he gets back home. That’s all.

I continue to lie to myself as I open up the box, finding a pile of old looking books. I pick them up carefully, handling them with the care Cooper would expect. These are precious to him and therefore, they’re precious to me as well.

I notice he has some things flagged with little sticky notes so I carefully flip through those pages first. The first page talks about the very first vampire created. Apparently vampirism was initially a curse brought on by a powerful goddess who was jilted by a man. He cheated on her and in return, she cursed him with the need for drinking blood. Later on, Lady Fate looked upon the vampire and decided to show him mercy. She gifted him with the ability to live forever and sire a family through transforming people, or through birth.

I’m fascinated as I read over the words, almost forgetting that this is relevant to my life now. I read about the bond a vampire has with their sire. A freshly turned vampire often feels attached to their creator. Lady Fate wanted this bond to be something special, like a pair of best friends sharing eternity together. I clench my fist, thinking about the way the woman who did this to me took something initially beautiful and corrupted it so thoroughly. That fucking asshole.

I flip through the pages, finding the next tag that Cooper has left me. I read the words ‘true mate’ and my stomach flips. What’s this?