Page 29 of Boys Like You

Breathing becomes harder, more panicked. What if their therapists are saying being around me is bad for them? How will I get through a day without them? Oh god, I am latching onto them like a leech.

“Are you okay?” Lena asks.

No, I’m not okay. I feel faint, and my chest feels like it’s closing in on me.

“I need to get some fresh air.” I don’t even say goodbye, I just run from the room. Maximus stands and so does Beth, but I walk past them and out into the street.

I can’t breathe. What if they leave me? Levi is afraid I will leave them but what if it’s the other way around?

I lean against the building, trying to implement the breathing techniques Lena just ran me through, but they don’t seem to be working. My breathing becomes rapid. Maximus stands next to me, holding out an ear bud. My hands are shaky, but I manage to get it in my ear. I was expecting the same playlist, but this time it’s someone different. I keep breathing through the song as the crooner’s voice seduces me. The panic starts to fade and I open my eyes. Maximus is squatting in front of me, and I’m sitting even though I don’t remember doing so. He looks at me with concerned eyes, and I give him a tight smile.

“Who is this?” I ask, pointing to my ear. He holds out the phone so I can see. Michael Bublé.

“Can you add this to my playlist later? His voice is magical, it’s like it healed me from the inside out. You’re awesome, Maximus, do you know that?” He shakes his head no and looks down at his feet.

“Hey, don’t be shy around me. I won’t ever intentionally embarrass you. If it wasn’t for you, I could be dead. You’re my saviour, my super hero.”

He looks up at me and smiles. “Now let’s go tell Beth I’m fine.” He stands, helping me up. We lock eyes, I step forward and kiss him on the cheek. He blushes again.

After we found Beth waiting by her car, I apologised for running out, then she dropped Maximus and I off at her house so she could go pick up the kids.

Maximus is drawing or writing in his book, but every time I try to sneak a look he closes it. There’s some superhero movie on in the background.

I think I freaked him out today and just want to give him some space to collect himself before Mercer gets here to pick us up to go bowling.

Pulling out my phone, I text Levi, asking him to talk. I need to know if what Lena says is true, and he is the one who will truthfully tell me.

Me:Are you busy tonight?

He texts back immediately.

Levi:I thought we decided on bowling?

Me:I mean after

Levi:Why?

Me:We need to talk

Levi:Are you breaking up with me?

Me:You don’t even like me, so no need for a break up.

Levi:I never said I didn’t like you

Me:You didn’t have to. Can we talk in person to clear everything up? I need to ask you something

Levi:Sure, I will give you a lift home and we can talk.

Me:Thank you

Levi:: )

Maximus and I finish the movie before I decide to get changed. What does someone wear bowling? I rummage through the clothes Beth saved over the years until I find a black pair of jeans with a rip in the knees, a Rolling Stones t-shirt and a leather jacket.

While I’m in the bathroom, I fluff my hair a bit to give it some extra volume and add some black eye liner, just as Mr Cole showed me. Maybe makeup is something I was good at before I became JD.

I walk back into my room feeling good. Maximus looks up at me and then back to his phone before he whips his head up to look at me again, his mouth slightly open. I can’t help but smirk at his reaction. He pulls out his phone, and within a second, my phone buzzes with a group message.

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