Page 35 of Fast Justice

He grinned, his dimples appearing. “How about you spend the night at my place, then? I’ll make sure you’re tucked in and asleep by eleven. Okay, make that midnight.”

Not a good idea. “No, I think I’ll just head home.” She softened the rejection with a smile.

He slung an arm around her shoulders. She liked the feel of it too much. Was tempted to ignore the niggling at the back of her head and risk taking things to the next level. “You sure?”

“Yes. I need a good night’s sleep and if I want to keep my job, I have to be in the office early and stay late the rest of the week.”

Before she could tack on that she could only see him on weekends, he hugged her into his side and said, “Come on, you only live once. And you can sleep when you’re dead.”

He was joking, that was clear in his tone, but she stiffened, cold sluicing through her as the words triggering memories of life with her ex.

Sleep is for the weak,Carter used to say.He’d turned out to be controlling and possessive. Always pushing her to get his way. Nothing she did was ever good enough. God, she’d dreaded coming home to him near the end. And Malcolm was a former SEAL. He had that same relentless, never-quit attitude ingrained in him too.

In that moment, any confusion she’d had about ending things evaporated. They were done. Part of her had been hoping for a clear sign to help her figure out how to handle this, and she’d just gotten it. She didn’t want to go there again with another military alpha male. Been there, done that, still had the scar.

She stopped in the middle of the sidewalk, her mind made up. “Malcolm.”

He stopped too, looked down at her with his arm still around her shoulders, a slight frown pulling his eyebrows together at her tone. “What?”

How the hell did she say this without hurting him or coming across as a total bitch? “Look, things at work are crazy right now, and you’re leaving for four months overseas soon. I need to focus on my career and not let distractions get in the way.” She pulled away from his embrace, unable to say the rest with him touching her. “You’re a great guy. I like you a lot, and I’ve enjoyed our time together.” Until tonight. “But I’m not ready to be in a committed relationship again yet, so I think it’s best if we stop seeing each other now, rather than drag things out.”

Her heart thudded in her ears as he stared at her, disbelief in his dark eyes.

“Is this because I brought up the apartment?” he said quietly.

Partly. But mostly because this would never work in the long run. She knew that from past experience. “No, it’s just that the timing is bad for me. I’m really sorry.” When he didn’t say anything, just kept watching her with thatare you seriouslook on his face, she bolted. “You don’t need to drive me home, I’ll grab myself a cab.”

Without waiting for him to respond, she spun around and hurried to the curb to hail a cab and didn’t look back.

The memory hung over them now like a heavy thundercloud, oppressive and dark.

“Too serious,” Malcolm repeated in a low voice, that same stunned look on his face as when she’d walked away that night.

She raised her chin a notch, her fingers twitching at her sides. Yeah, she’d really left him standing there on the sidewalk, thinking she was making the right decision. God, how wrong she’d been. “Yes. We’d only been dating a few weeks and I was just out of a bad relationship, and you were calling me every day, wanting to see me every night even though I was swamped with work, and then you asked about looking at that place together.” Her baggage about Carter wasn’t Malcolm’s fault, so she didn’t add that, although it had been a factor at the time. “Way too much, way too fast.”

“Then what about the keychain?”

What the hell did that have to do with anything? “What about it?”

“It’s a stupid keychain. Why keep it all this time if it was so easy for you to walk away?”

“Because…”Because I missed you and wanted something to remember you by.“It doesn’t matter. The point is, you came on too strong, too fast.” Her tone was defensive, but she couldn’t help it. He was chipping away at her arguments the way she did with a witness in the courtroom.

For a moment Malcolm simply stared at her in incredulity. Then his expression turned shocked and his mouth opened slightly. “Oh my God.You were scared,” he said, his voice barely above a whisper.

Her face went stiff. “No I wasn’t.”No, I was terrified.

“Yes you were,” he breathed, and took a step toward her. She edged back but had nowhere to go, her fingers curling around the edge of the table. “You were scared to death of what I made you feel. Weren’t you?”

“No,” she whispered, the sheer vulnerability in that one word almost splitting her heart open.

“Yeah, you were.” He shook his head in wonder. “God, you hid it so well beneath that strong, independent exterior, even I missed it.”

She gave a tiny shake of her head, in fervent denial, the movement jerky, convulsive as she leaned back more.

But unlike a year ago, there was nowhere for her to go now. No escape. And his insight was dead on.

Scared.

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