Page 48 of Fast Justice

“About us.” She paused a beat. “What do you want to happen between us from here on out?”

He was quiet a moment, and she held her breath, all her secret fears bubbling to the surface. “We won’t be able to see each other while I’m on this assignment,” he finally said.

She pushed back a frustrated noise, forced her insecurities back into the box they’d escaped from. “I know, but I mean after that. Are we…was this morning a one-off for you, or…”

“Or?”

“Or do you want more?”Please say yes.She couldn’t bear it if he said no.

“I guess that depends on you.”

She blinked, surprised. “Why on me?”

He sighed. “Look, now isn’t the best time to have this conversation. We’ll talk about it later.”

She didn’t care if it was a bad time. With everything going on, if they waited for a good time, it might never happen. If that’s what he was hoping for, too bad for him. “No, tell me what you meant.”

“You want the truth?” He made it sound like she might not like it.

An invisible weight settled on her chest, pressing her lungs. Her heart thudded in her ears. “Yes.”

“I think I made it clear where I stood a year ago, but that’s not what you wanted. I won’t do that to myself again unless I know you’re in this for real this time.”

The pressure eased even as her heart swelled, a tentative smile tugging at her lips. “I am.”

Another pause. “How do I know I can trust that you mean it this time?”

She flinched inside, hating how much she’d hurt him. “Because now I can admit that I made a mistake back then, and I also realize that my reasons for walking away were bullshit. I’ve missed you, and I want to be with you. Just you,” she added, in case that wasn’t clear. It was hard to put herself out there like this in the face of possible rejection, but it had to be done. “I want you in my life. To come home to you, lean on you, and for you to lean on me.”

“You sure?” He didn’t sound completely convinced.

“Yes. I’ve never been surer of anything in my life.” She could understand why he would have reservations about trusting her again, though.

“Well…good, then.” There was a smile in his voice. “Then let’s hope this assignment wraps up fast, huh?”

“God, yes.” She laughed, feeling like half the weight she’d been carrying around on her shoulders had suddenly been lifted. She wanted to talk about them more, make sure everything was spelled out clearly, but wouldn’t push him right now. For the moment it was enough that he was willing to give them another chance. “I really miss you.”

He chuckled softly. “Miss you too. I gotta go now, but I’ll call later if I can.”

“Okay. Bye.”

“Bye.”

Rowan set the phone down in her lap and drew the first full breath she’d taken in days, the relief crashing over her so acute that her entire body sagged. Against all odds, it seemed that Malcolm was hers again.

As long as she had him by her side—even if it was only in a metaphorical sense while they were separated—she could get through anything.

Chapter Seventeen

A stream of rapid Spanish burst through the room along with feminine crying when Oceane and her mother were finally reunited at the secure condo location that afternoon. Mal stood at the far end of the kitchen to give them a semblance of privacy and met Lockhart’s long-suffering gaze as his teammate walked in and locked the front door behind him.

Kill me now, Lockhart’s expression said, and Mal bit back a smirk of sympathy. They’d both rather be doing alotof things right now than guarding a cartel lieutenant’s daughter and mistress. Most of all, Mal would give anything to trade places with one of the agents placed on Rowan’s new detail.

Their phone call earlier had helped a lot. This morning had been amazing, yet part of him had still been worried that he’d made another huge mistake in letting her back in. He’d opened himself up to her once before and gotten his heart smashed to pieces for his trouble.

She seemed different now, and not just because she’d let her guard down and they’d finally slept together. Although being with her that way had been ten times better than he’d ever imagined it would be. It helped that she was taking ownership of her former actions, and that she’d said she was willing to work on things.

He just hoped she would live by those words, because honest to God if she bailed on him again it would fucking crush him.

---