Page 13 of Fast Fury

“Like I said, not if it was with the right woman.” That glint in his eyes stirred her insides. “We both know what a bad situation looks like well enough to recognize it. And I’ve never been friends with someone first. I hear friendship is the best foundation there is for a relationship. Maybe that’s what I’ve been missing.”

The unmistakable heat in his eyes shocked her. Made her mouth go dry in a way that had nothing to do with the tannins in her wine. “I…” She trailed off, not knowing what to say without making a fool of herself.

He shut off the grill. “Food’s done. You ready to eat?” he asked, changing the subject as though he hadn’t just tipped her world on its axis.

She breathed a sigh of relief. “Yes.”

He scooped the steaks up onto the platter and carried them back inside. They sat across the table from one another and ate. The salad was light and tangy, the steaks perfectly cooked and seasoned. But throughout the whole meal she couldn’t stop thinking about whether he’d been serious about them getting together. It was driving her crazy.

“The steak’s perfect,” she told him in between bites. And she was a bit of a food snob, so she wouldn’t say it if it wasn’t true.

“Good.” He took a sip of beer, eyeing her. “So I’m curious.”

The way he watched her had that stirring sensation starting up in her lower belly again. “About what?”

“Noneof the dates you’ve been on recently went anywhere?”

She was relieved he’d let the part about them go. “One got a second date. And he shouldn’t have.”

He winced. “Was it bad?”

“Not terrible. Far from the worst date I’ve been on. We met through an online site, whereas the others I was set up with. But there was no fire with any of them. I mean, zero, not even a spark. Not that fire is the be all, end all when it comes to a potential relationship. I know it’s not that important because it always burns out eventually, but—”

“What are you even saying?”

She stopped, surprised by the vehemence in his tone. “What?”

“Chemistry iseverything, especially early on.”

She shook her head, confused. “No, it’s not. Chemistry is like false advertising. It’s an illusion, and it doesn’t last. Relationships need a hell of a lot more than physical attraction if they’re going to get off the ground. Like friendship, as you pointed out. Respect. Trust.” Her friendship with him had those things. But they might not last if they muddied the waters with physical things.

“Chemistry is every bit as important as all those things.” Kai shook his head at her, almost in disappointment. “What the hell kind of guys have you been with, short stuff?”

Abby blinked at him, at a loss as to how she should answer. He seemed convinced about his opinion, passionate. But he was a guy. They thought differently than women did. Was she missing something? Was there something wrong with her that she’d never experienced that kind of intense chemistry with anyone?

Kai leaned a muscular forearm on the table, a frown drawing his black eyebrows together. “What about the guy you were living with before you moved into your apartment?”

Roger. Even his name made her mentally make a face. “What about him?”

“You must have had great chemistry with him, right? At least in the beginning. I mean, you were with him for years and you guys lived together.”

She frowned, thinking about it. “I guess so. I mean, sort of.” Not really. “It was more that…”

That he paid attention to me.

She stopped herself before those damning, pathetic words could come out. Looking back on it now, she could see that Roger had dazzled her simply by showing interest and paying attention to her as she’d come out of her awkward teenage years. How sad was that? Even at twenty-two-years-old, she’d still been struggling so much with self-esteem and self-image issues from her teen years that she’d blindly given her heart to a man who hadn’t appreciated it, let alone respected it.

Or her. She’d allowed herself to be bullied and emotionally abused simply to have someone to come home to at night.

That still pissed her off. But that was Old Abby, and thankfully she was long gone. She was New Abby now, thanks to a lot of work. Powerful. Confident—mostly. Hear her roar.

She played with the stem of her wineglass, not wanting to look at Kai as she spoke. Her relationship with Roger wasn’t something she was proud of. “I should have left him after the second year when things started going downhill, but I kept telling myself things would get better. That he was stressed, that I should try harder, whatever.”

“What finally made you leave?” he asked quietly.

“It took me crying myself to sleep on my mom’s couch on New Year’s Eve after he and I had been in a huge, public fight at a party, to realize itwasn’tgoing to get better. If he could treat me like that in front of a big group of people, then he didn’t love or respect me. I guess it was like a light bulb went off in my head. It had never occurred to me before then just how bad things had gotten, or that I deserved better. I finally decided I’d rather be alone than feel that lonely in a relationship.” She looked up.

Kai’s jaw was tight, annoyance stamped all over his face. “I get it.”

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