Page 38 of Shattered

“And he’s just beautiful, Nathan.” Taya’s voice was rough with emotion. “Perfectly formed, all his little organs functioning exactly as they should. I’ve got a picture of his little profile.”

He couldn’t speak. Couldn’t find the words to express what he was feeling.A son.A little boy who would look up to him, depend on him, and needed his father to get his shit together in a hurry.

A gentle hand slid up the back of his neck to stroke his hair. “I know all this is hard on you,” she murmured quietly after a moment. “But we still have so much to be grateful for.”

Overwhelmed, he nodded, hugged her tighter. She was right. If this didn’t snap him out of his funk, nothing would. He’d already lost his sight and career. He couldn’t let the blindness take everything else from him. Couldn’t let it destroy the rest of his life, especially his marriage and the chance to raise their son together. Taya was the best thing that had ever happened to him. “I love you so damn much,” he choked out.

“I love you too. And so do your teammates. Don’t push us away so hard.”

He forced a nod, managed to hold it together. “I won’t.”

She took his face in her hands. “We need you, Nathan. All of us. And so does our son.”

“I’ll be there for you guys. Always.” He’d learn braille. There were audio books and dictation software, and probably thousands of other things that would help him. His brain was fine. He could learn how to use a computer again. Look into what career options he still had. Maybe the Bureau had something he could still do.

Starting right now, he was giving himself a major attitude adjustment. By the time this baby was born, he was going to have his shit firmly together.

Loosening his hold, he eased back from Taya. He froze, then blinked. His heart stuttered. He swore he’d just seen a dim flicker of light in his peripheral vision, coming from where the living room window should be. Tiny dots, like pinpricks.

Taya shifted. “What is it?”

But no. He must have imagined it. All he saw was darkness. “Nothing.”

She leaned up on tiptoe to press her lips to his. “I need to get going. Unless…” A loaded pause followed. “You want to come with me? Just for a little while.”

The unspoken plea in her voice stopped the automatic denial before it could fly out of his mouth.

Actions spoke louder than words. He had to prove to her that he meant what he’d just said.

It was high time he faced this head on and came to terms with it. And he missed the guys like hell.

“Yeah,” he said to her. “I’ll go with you.”

Chapter Fourteen

“I’m impressed. You changed that last diaper in twenty seconds flat,” Taya said as she climbed out of the driver’s seat of his truck.

Grinning, Nate got out of the passenger seat, shut his door and used his cane to follow her toward the elevator in their building’s underground parking lot. He was getting the hang of it now. He’d been practicing a lot of things since finding out they were having a son a few days ago. “What can I say, I’m good with my hands.”

“I can’t argue with that. You should have seen the way Clay was watching you while you changed Libby. He was hovering over you the whole time, keeping an eagle eye on his baby girl even though you had her laid out flat on the floor.” She chuckled. “Zoe just shook her head at him.”

They’d gone over there for dinner, and so Nate could practice getting the hang of changing and dressing Libby. He felt way more confident now about his ability to help out with their son when he was born. “I don’t blame him. But at least she’s big enough now that I’m not afraid I’ll break her. When our little guy is born he’s gonna be so tiny.”

The team gathering the other night had gone well, better than he’d expected. The guys had been ecstatic to see him. Instead of pitying him or treating him like an invalid, they’d treated him exactly as they had before, trash talking and doling out shit like they always did. Nate had loved every moment of it. DeLuca had even promised to reach out to contacts on his behalf to see if there were any suitable openings in the Bureau for him.

“You’ll be fantastic with him. Every time I imagine you holding him when he’s born, I swear my heart will explode.”

Nate smiled at that. His sense of touch was even more acute now than it had been before the accident. Something he’d been exploring with the help of Taya’s naked body, to gratifying results. “I can’t wait to hold him. I’m gonna be right in there during the delivery. I want to catch him and cut the cord. And I plan to rub that in Bauer’s face so hard.”

She snorted. “Why does this not surprise me. I swear you guys—”

Her words cut off so abruptly that he stopped dead, his muscles tensing. “Tay?” His body was on red alert, his remaining senses scanning for the threat.

“Hi, Nate. And you must be Taya.”

The sound of that voice from over by the elevators sent a chill racing down his spine even as anger roared through him.Dara. “What are you doing here?” he demanded.

“I came to see you, make sure you were doing okay. I kept trying to find out, but nobody would return my calls.”

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