Page 15 of Reclaimed (Hostage Rescue Team)

Adam shook his head. “How did you guys handle it when they were taken? Zoe and Celida.”

Bauer and Tuck looked at each other for a moment before facing him. “It was tough,” Bauer answered, his blue eyes somber. “Toughest thing I’ve ever gone through. So I know how you’re feeling, I get it. And like Tuck said, remember we’ve all got your back through this.”

Adam knew all that. He cleared his throat, thought of something to say to fill the pause. He’d been careful not to let anyone know the extent of the deterioration of his marriage or the reasons behind it, but fuck it. These were his brothers and he knew they wouldn’t judge him.

“We’d been having problems for about two years now.” Bauer and his wife were expecting a baby in a few months so this topic of conversation probably wasn’t all that welcome, but he didn’t know what the hell else to talk about and he’d held everything in for so long.

He drew in a deep breath. “We lost a baby.” It was such a relief to say it aloud.

A shocked silence filled the room. He didn’t look at the others.

“Well, three of them, to be honest. We’d been trying to get pregnant for over a year and nothing happened. Eventually we had to resort to IVF. We lost the first one pretty early on. But the second one was…” He pressed his lips together, fought the sudden constriction in his throat. “It was tough.” He risked a look up, saw Bauer staring at him with the kind of sudden awareness only another expectant father could have.

“Shit, man, I never knew. I’m sorry.”

“Me too,” Tuck added.

Adam nodded. “Thanks. I just didn’t want to talk about it with anyone back then.” Which, as it turned out, was the main reason things had gone from bad to worse between him and Summer. “We were at that training thing in San Diego when it happened. I flew home as soon as I got the news but the truth is, I…wasn’t there for her afterward. Not like I should have been.” He’d been upset too, of course, but now he recognized not in the same way she’d been.

When he thought of his lack of communication and impatience with her in the aftermath, he wanted to go back in time and deliver a throat punch to himself.

It still crushed him, shamed him to know he hadn’t been there for her in her darkest hour. Not in the way she’d needed him to be. He hadn’t understood that until a few months ago, until she’d moved out and been ready to sign the separation papers she’d had drawn up.

He didn’t blame her for wanting out. And even though he didn’t know what she’d been through on that horrible day, he could guess well enough. He’d tortured himself with it ever since.

You don’t know what it was like. You weren’tthere. You wereneverthere.

The memory of Summer’s emotional accusation reverberated in his skull, wrapped around his ribcage like a python and squeezed.

He blew out an unsteady breath. “I swore to her I’d never let her down like that again. I promised I’d always be there for her after that.” And now, when she needed him more than ever and was facing the unthinkable at the hands of those animals, he wasn’t there.

He. Wasn’t. There.

He shook his head, refusing to accept it. “I’ve gotta find her. I can’t lose her or I’ll—” His throat closed up.

Tuck got up and came over to lay a hand on his shoulder, his big hand gripping tight. “We’ll find her. And we’ll bring her home safe and sound.”

On the verge of losing it, Adam dropped his face into his hands and sent out a silent prayer. A vow he’d die trying to uphold.

I wasn’t there for you before. And it’s true that I don’t know what you went through back then. But I love you and I’m not giving up. So wherever you are right now, Summer, please hold on. I won’t stop searching until I find you.

****

Eight years ago

The past week had crawled by for Summer with agonizing sluggishness, but she’d been looking forward to this for days and now it was finally time.

She checked her reflection in the bathroom mirror one last time before heading out into her bedroom where she had her laptop waiting on the bed. That familiar sense of excitement and anticipation built as she logged onto her Skype account and waited cross-legged atop her quilt.

Adam had told her he’d call between seven and eight her time tonight, unless he got called out for a mission or briefing. The last two times they’d tried to schedule this he hadn’t been able to make it. Not seeing or talking to him was slowly driving her insane.

She worried about him and his buddies. Normally she stopped watching the news in an effort to avoid seeing the terrible things happening in the area Adam was stationed, but that didn’t help much because she got more than ample information about what was going on in southern Afghanistan at work. Sometimes ignorance really was bliss.

Her pulse jumped when the call came in. She answered it, and a moment later Adam’s face appeared on the screen. Her cheeks ached from the wide smile that stretched her mouth. He smiled back, the adoration and pleasure on his face making her heart roll over in her chest. “Hey, doll.”

She loved it when he called her that. “Hey, handsome. How are you?” God, he looked good. Tired, but good. She missed him so much it hurt.

“Great. Sorry I couldn’t do this sooner. We’ve been busy.”

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