Page 65 of Sinner's End

She sobs, great wracking moans that rattle her body, tearing her throat until she rasps before me. And still I smile at her, wishing I could feel her lips move under mine one more time.

“You are so beautiful, do you know that?” I trace a hand over her hair, not quite touching the silken locks. Undeserving to lay my hand on her again. “Find a human, Addi. Make love to a man who will adore you as you do him.”

Horror fills her face. “You’re rejecting me?” she whispers, her hands shaking as she reaches for me.

Sadness overwhelms me. “Love, I’m saying goodbye. This …you’ll die with us.”

“I don’t care!” she fires back.

My smile returns. “I know, Love. You’re so stunning when you’re roused. Find yourself a good man. Find four, if that’s what it takes.”

“No one will replace you. Not ever.” Her breath catches in her throat, her eyes reddening as her tears wash her skin clean with loss and salt.

“Perhaps.”

I place my hands on her shoulders and lean in to press my lips to her temple. “Because I love you, I’ll break your rules once more. Just once, my love.”

Hope flares in her face, and my heart cracks. After this, there is no coming back. She’ll hate me the way I once hated her.

“Goodbye, Adreana. My love.”

My lips upon her skin are the last sacrilege, the finalcontact I need as I blink, shifting us to her room, lingering just long enough to see my loss reflected in her eyes, before I return to Harken and shatter the link with Sinner’s End. Even I can’t reestablish that connection now.

I stand in my study, leaning my back against the broken desk and face Kaleb who has finally dragged his horrified ass up to my level.

And he shouts the words at me that he wanted to scream downstairs, but couldn’t then. Nothing, however, stops him from voicing those four tiny words right now.

“What did you do?” he demands, out of breath, out of everything.

Like me. All of us.

Lethe appears, wraithlike behind him. The angel places the black blade on the stone floor of my office. It makes no sound whatsoever.

I close my eyes, unable to face either of them for this next part. “I told her I loved her. And I took her home.”

The finality of that simple phrase is enough to rock us all.

Kaleb slides to the floor, places his forehead on his knees, and cries. Lethe stares at the knife on the floor and looks torn between picking it up and joining his brother in arms.

Me? I stare out the window, and wonder how many souls I need to steal to make Harken sing again. One for every single stone in the foundations to the tip of the bell tower. Five hundred and fifty-four thousand, two hundred and twenty-three.

Enough to drown out my screams each night of why I let her go. Why I let myself be tortured and alone. Why I sent her into another’s arms.

But first, I need to find myself a new Chemist. And figure out what the fuck Bowen did with the soul of my old one.

Chapter Thirty-One

The Bleakest Heart

Adreana

For long minutes I sit on the stained carpet of my bedroom floor, allowing myself to feel the true heart-wrenching pain flowing through me at Mana’s rejection. And that’s exactly what this shit is, no matter what he says.

He rejected me, pushed me away, and made decisions for more than just himself.

The longer I sit here, the worse it gets. Not the heartache, the anger. Rage claws its way up my throat until I am all but drowning in it. I know I made a decision out of fear but he is making his out of some twisted sense of chivalry or whatever the fuck he wants to call it. He is trying to protect me when he is really leaving me wide open. I no longer have anyone watching my back.

“Fuck!” I cry out, pulling at the strands of my hair.