Page 67 of Please Remember

"I'm not positive this isourAllie," Drew says. "The Allie we knew was only dating Jax to make me insanely jealous."

"You're off your nut!" Benji says. "She was dating Jax to makemecrazy with jealousy."

Rolling his eyes, Jax just shakes his head as both men get on one knee, each taking one of my hands. "Get up, you freaks," he barks at them.

"If you want to test the waters and see if you really want to be with Jax, I'm offering up my services, Allie," Benji says, kissing my hand.

Drew copies him before saying, "No, let me take you out. I'll show you how much you truly love me. You won't even remember Jax's name when we've gone to the one other place in this town that isn't this bar."

I laugh, and I instinctively know both of them are rarely, if ever, serious. My eyes land on Sage who just nods as though reading my mind, and I feel a little disappointment.

I want to do that. To know what someone thinks because I know them so well and can read their body language. Like how I supposedly used to so many years ago.

Drinks start flowing, and Jax stays near me, his hand in mine like he told me we always did in public. Other patrons in the bar filter in as the time passes, and I start to feel a little claustrophobic. Something also starts weighing on me, but I can't quite make out what it is.

"Remember that one time," Benji starts for the fifth time that I've been paying attention, and I suddenly feel like I want to crawl out of my skin.

Something causes a chill to run up and down my spine, and I look around the room for the reason. A cold feeling washes over me, and I can’t help but feel as though my captor is nearby. The person I haven’t been able to unmask since I left that basement. It’s almost overwhelming, and I need some air.

"Hey," I say to Sage, pulling my hand from Jax's. "Come outside with me?"

Nodding, she smiles. "Please. If I have to hear one more Benji story, I'm certain I’ll drink myself in to a blackout and make terrible life decisions."

I force a laugh and turn to Jax. "We're going to get some air."

"Do you want me to go with you? Or do you want to go home? I know this is kind of a lot, especially with the rest of the town in here," Jax asks.

"No, you stay and chat. I just need a little breather, but I'm good. This was good," I assure him even though I know I’ve paled at least two shades.

Sage takes my hand and leads me through the crowd of people, her added height giving her an advantage and a confidence I don't have. The moment we step outside, she turns to me. "Talk to me, babe. What's wrong?"

"I feel... I don't know," I say, and the frustration takes over at my lack of ability to communicate effectively.

"Benji's stories, especially once he's started drinking, can get really annoying. They all start exactly the same.Remember that one time. I swear, it's like a variationofAmerican Pie."

Shaking my head, I sigh. "It's not him."

"Stop pressuring yourself so much to remember. It's probably like that whole thing with people trying to get pregnant. The moment they stop, it happens," Sage says and rubs my arm. "It'll come back."

"This is going to sound crazy."

"I like crazy. And Ilovecrazy Allie," she says with a smile.

"It feels like the person who did this is somewhere nearby. I can’t really explain it, but more than that, I feel like I'm going to remember."

She frowns and crinkles her nose. "I thought you already felt like you would."

"No, more like something tonight is going to bring it back. And maybe I can finally settle this nagging feeling in my mind."

"Be careful, Al. Remember the last time you were certain something would bring your memory back? The sex was great, but you were devastated afterwards. I don't want you to be let down," she says. "It was hard enough hearing you talk about it the next day."

My hypervigilance begins to fade, but it’s quickly replaced with a buzzed feeling in my mind. The way alcohol hits before becoming drunk. Except I’m not drunk. In fact, the blurry images that won’t go away seem to be clearing.

I shake my head. "No, it's different. It's like the veil is thinning. I just... I have to figure out what it is that's going to make it disappear."

"How can I help?"

"Walk me through what we know about that night," I say. "Where was I?"

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