Page 14 of Please Remember

One of them is of me, covered in snow, and I look to be mid-laugh as Jax lifts me off the ground. It looks like a good memory.

"That one is from a trip we took to Colorado. You'd just learned to ski, and you aren't very good at it. But you were determined. Hellbent, actually, and you ended up doing what we call a yard sale. You laid in the snow, laughing, and made a snow angel."

"Yard sale?"

A smile appears on his face. "You spun in the air and lost all of your stuff. I'm talking poles, skis, hat, sunglasses, and one of your mittens. You were shaking as you laid there, and I worried you were hurt and crying. But you were laughing. Then, as though to say you meant to dothat, you started to make a snow angel where you landed. You were so adorable that I had to lie down and make one, too."

"We look like we were happy," I say as I look at the other pictures.

I keep hoping something jumps out at me. A picture that will trigger my memories. With how many pictures and locked-up memories hang around here, something has to leap out at me, right?

"We were happy. Very happy," he says with a sigh. "I never gave up hope you were alive, Allie. Never."

Avoiding that conversation because I’m not quite ready yet, I gesture towards the front door. "The FOR SALE sign is gone."

"I'm not selling the house anymore."

"Why not?"

Pain fills his eyes when I look at him, and an immediate sense of guilt washes over me. He seems to show all of his emotions in his eyes, and I'm surprised at how easily I can read them. I do like his chocolate brown eyes. They match his hair, and I momentarily get lost in them as I stare. It feels familiar, but I don't remember anything specifically. Not even the five or so pictures of us looking at each other just like this spark a memory.

"Because it's your home. Because I was only selling it when I was going to marry someone because I couldn't live here with another woman."

"You're not getting married anymore?"

"No." Jax shakes his head.

"Jax—"

"I never wanted to in the first place. There was all this pressure to move on, and then there was pressure to keep going. I thought I could make myself love someone else, but there's only you, Allie. I couldn't live my life with Laura. Hell, I was an hour late to my own engagementparty last night when I found you because I didn't want to go. And I didn't want to go because I don't want to marry her."

The way he looks at me fills me with guilt. He looks like he has so much love in his heart for me, and the intensity in his stare sometimes feels like a nonverbal plea to remember him. Remember us. The strength of his longing is overwhelming.

Maybe staying here wasn't a good idea. Maybe I'll just hurt him.

The front door opens, and I jump as Sage's blonde head pops inside. "Hey, guys."

"Hey, Sage," Jax says. "Come in."

"I just wanted to check and see how Allie's settled in. Do you need anything?"

Sage came into the hospital room that first night and introduced herself. She's my best friend, apparently. When she broke down into sobs, it was awkward and confusing for me. I mean, how do you comfort a woman you don’t know?

"I think we're good," Jax says. "Do you need anything, Allie?"

“I’m not sure how I’d even begin to know what the hell I need because I don’t know what I have. Memory loss, remember?" I answer with full honesty.

Sage laughs. "That's my girl."

"Remind me how we met," I say, thinking maybe something further back than Jax and I will jog my memory.

"We were in preschool together when we were four. There was this boy, Bobby Miller, who ran up to me and pushed me on the playground. I cried, as a normal little girl would, and then he and his friends circled me, pointing and laughing. Calling me a crybaby. I hadn't made any friends yet because it was my first day, and we'd just moved to town. You, having grown up here for those first four years, ran up and kickedBobby in the knee, and he fell right next to me. He scraped his elbow as he fell, and he started crying. You just stood there, cocked out your hip, crossed your arms, and said, 'Who's the crybaby now?' We've been best friends ever since."

The story makes me smile. If I'm going to be any type of person, I want to be the type who would stand up for my friends. "That's a funny story. What ever happened to Bobby Miller?"

"He moved away sophomore year. He's married to a redheaded boy named Chuck. For some reason, a lot of guys I know named Chuck have red hair. I don't get it."

"Like that kid fromRugrats," Jax says.

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