Page 13 of Chubs

“You’re important to me, Chubs, but so is Lucy. You’re my club brother, but she’s the closest thing Bailey has to a sister. As your VP, I have to side with you if there’s a split. But—and it’s a big one—I’ll make you regret every bad decision you’ve ever made if those decisions hurt Lucy in any way. Also, the next time I call or text you and you blow me off, we’re heading for the ring. Our Prez would already be thumping you around if he didn’t have so many spinning plates at the moment. Club rules apply to all of us, even you. Also, out of loyalty to you, may I suggest you avoid Trigger at all costs?”

With that, another one of the people I love most walks away angry at me. Just like it was with Lucy, I realize those may have been our last words ever spoken to each other.

Shaking off the guilt, I follow Pigeon and Ivy to his truck. I spend the next few days helping at Ivy’s ranch and acting like the Chubs everyone is used to. I flash smiles, make jokes, and even wrestle Horse over food. The day finally comes for me to say goodbye to the life I came to love and return to the one I never wanted.

Chapter 6

Lucy

As our plane banks to the side after takeoff, I swear I see a lone biker parked outside of the airport. My heart clenches, and I know it’s Chubs watching our plane leave his universe. It’s painful to even draw breath, so I don’t bother trying until reflex kicks in. Regret for not spending that last night with him hits hard, but I refuse to accept all the blame.

When I can no longer see the biker, I lean my head back on the headrest and close my eyes. Concentrating on breathing one breath in, holding for three seconds, and then releasing it slowly, I’m unaware of the concerned eyes aimed in my direction. I stay deathly still until our flight attendant asks about my drink preference.

“Coke, please.”

I receive my drink and turn to see Lisa watching me closely.

“I’m okay, Sis. Really. I’m going to shove all things Lucy and Chubs into a box and forget about them for the next week. I just want—need—to spend time with Dad, sightsee with, and do battle with you. I have a few more moves I haven’t used on you yet,” I say with a small, forced grin.

Lisa continues to study my face for a few more beats before going along with my play.

“Which one of those gorgeous, tatted bikers do I have to thank for teaching you skills to use against me?” she asks.

“Mostly Cash, but Axel, Pooh, and Vex have all worked with me before too. They’re big on the women having some self-defense abilities. You should come to the gym and take some classes with me,” I explain.

“Cash? The godlike Viking man? Sign me up,” she orders.

“I thought for sure you’d insist on Vex. He’s the pretty one but doesn’t like being called that. Said he’s tired of people asking if he has a dick. By people, he means Axel and Craig,” I say with a small laugh.

“Can you imagine if Craig were Axel’s son? I would pity Bailey so much, but her life would never be boring,” Lisa declares with a snort.

“Not to interrupt, but do you think the guys would let me come to the gym for classes too?” Mom asks from across the aisle.

“Absolutely they would. They’ve designed several levels of classes just for women now. I didn’t know you were interested in self-defense, though,” I answer.

“With all they do for New Horizons and the women there, I have to admit I’m very impressed with them. The more I’ve thought about it, the more I’ve realized that any training, any knowledge, is never a waste of time learning. Hopefully, it’s never needed, but if it ever is, I should be prepared. Could us three ladies take the classes together?” Mom questions.

“That’s a great idea, Mom. Count me in,” Lisa adds.

“I’ll set it up when we get back,” I respond, and I realize I like the idea of my mom and sister taking their own safety seriously.

“Lord help me,” Dad mutters while flipping through a folder of official-looking papers.

A few mornings after we arrived in Washington, D.C., I awake suddenly, panting for air. I don’t know what woke me, but I feel very unsettled. I listen for any unusual sounds before lifting my head and looking around the room. Nothing is out of the ordinary, but I’ve learned to trust gut instincts. Climbing out of bed, I pad around the room, checking door locks and windows. Everything is secure, and nothing is out of place, and yet the bad feeling persists. Sitting on the bed, I grab my phone and look to see if I have any texts. There’s one.

Chubs: I love you, always will, and I’m so sorry for not being all that you deserve. I don’t expect or hope for your forgiveness but one day I hope you’ll understand why I made the decisions I made. I wish you all the happiness possible because you deserve only the best. I love you, will to my dying breath, and beyond.

I reread the text several times, but the words don’t change. Chubs, my heart and soul, just told me goodbye. Instantly, I know he’s left not only me but Denver and The Devil’s Angels behind. Setting my phone down, I lay across the bed, then slowly wrap myself in the comforter. I force my mind to go blank and refuse the tears that threaten to fall. I simply exist for a few hours before the door that connects Lisa’s room to mine opens.

When Lisa sits next to my hip, I move an arm enough to pick up my phone, open it to Chubs’ text and hand it to her. After a silent moment, my sister sets my phone down, lifts the edge of the comforter, and settles against my back. Wrapping her arms around me, we stay cocooned from the world for a long time.

“I can have him found if you give me all the information you know about him,” Dad insists for the second time.

“I won’t let you get involved, Dad. He’s made choices, right or wrong, but they were his to make. There’re things about his past you don’t know and, because of your position, can’t know. Please don’t let his past ruin your future too,” I say in a weary voice.

“Do you know more than he thinks you do?” my dad questions while turning away from the window to face me.

I hear the hint of accusation in his tone. Dad knows his daughters well. I nod my head once, then tilt my chin in a slightly defiant way. Instantly, Dad’s hands land on his hips, and he frowns.

---