Page 49 of Chubs

When Prissy stands, her crest feathers on end, and sticks her face into Pigeon’s, I join Ivy in laughing. Pigeon makes a desperate attempt to avoid her beak and nearly falls off his chair. This makes Ivy and I laugh even harder, and Prissy moves to the table in front of Pigeon’s plate. While staring Pigeon down, Prissy drinks from his glass by dunking most of her head inside it.

“No! Oh crap, Prissy, no, don’t drink that! It’s beer!” Ivy shouts as she hurriedly covers the glass with her hand.

“Just what we need. A drunk large-assed bird that already has an attitude,” Pigeon mutters while taking the glass from Ivy.

“Peer?” Prissy asks with a head tilt.

“It’s not good for birds, sweetie. Don’t ever drink it,” Ivy explains while Pigeon takes the glass to the sink behind the bar.

“Neva,” Prissy agrees.

“Have you had any before? Like, before you came to our table?” I ask suspiciously.

“Yup,” Prissy states while popping the “p” loudly.

“Oh, this isn’t good,” Ivy says worriedly. “Where’s Ava? Maybe she’s run into this with Mac and knows what to do.”

“Just saw her head into the kitchen. I’ll get her,” Pigeon says as he returns to our table then leaves it again.

“She’s probably fine. She didn’t get that much,” I state and then watch as Prissy slowly tips over and lands face first in Pigeon’s mashed potatoes.

Ivy quickly picks her up and is wiping her face clean when Ava and Pigeon arrive at the table.

“Mac got into a few mixed drinks once. It can be very serious, but the vet told me what to watch for. Mostly, don’t let them fly at all. Mac was slurring his words, and he was hungover the next day. Scary as hell but amusing once I knew he was okay. Let me take her into the kitchen and see if I can get her to drink some water. Someone call Axel, please,” Ava says as she takes Prissy from Ivy.

Before Ava makes it to the kitchen door, Prissy starts singing loudly. It takes me a few seconds to place the song due to her slurring, but “The Night the Lights Went Out In Georgia” has new meaning after hearing a drunk cockatoo belt it out. Her lights were certainly going to go out tonight. When Prissy disappears into the kitchen, Mac picks up the song where she left off. He tosses in several loud laughs, most likely because he knows Prissy’s going to be in a world of hurt tomorrow. Knowing how bratty Mac can be, I wouldn’t be surprised to find out he’s the one that talked her into indulging.

A few minutes later, Axel comes crashing through the door, looking frantic. I point toward the kitchen, and he barely slows when he gets to the swinging door. A loud crash, a wail, and then swearing comes from behind the door as all heads turn in that direction.

Toes comes stumbling through the door, holding both hands over his face. James tosses a bar towel at him, and it lands perfectly on his shoulder. When Toes just stands there, not making any moves to use the towel, I get up and approach him. Taking the towel in one hand, I pull at his arm with the other. When his hands drop, I press the towel to his bloody nose. His eyes are both already swelling, and he has a huge knot on his forehead, but he’s on his feet and should survive. I continue holding the towel, giving him a minute to collect himself. When he slowly opens his eyes and spots me, he snatches the towel from my hand and leaps backward. Shocked, I take a step back too.

“You! I should have known you are here! Bad shit always happens when you’re around!” he shouts at me while pointing at my face with a finger.

“That’s not nice! Don’t holler at her!” Craig bellows as he charges across the room to stand between Toes and me.

“It’s true! She’s fucking evil!” Toes continues his rant.

Craig draws back and swings hard before I can stop him. Toes bends forward then drops to the floor, not knowing whether to hold the towel to his nose or cup his boy parts.

“That dick punch wasn’t Lucy’s fault either! That was all me!” Craig fumes. “Axel ran you over, and I dropped you. Apologize to Lucy, or I’m calling for Loki.”

“It’s okay, Craig, he just freaked out,” I attempt to calm things down.

“It’s not okay, Lucy. Toes called you evil, and that’s just number one bullshit,” Craig continues angrily.

Pooh steps beside me, leans down, and speaks quietly with Craig for a moment. Eventually, they bump fists and turn to walk away, but Craig takes my hand and insists I walk with them. When we get to the table I was sitting at, I tug on Craig’s hand. When he looks up at me, I lean down and hug him.

“Thank you for sticking up for me,” I whisper in his ear.

“Chubs asked me to look out for you, but I would’ve done it anyway,” Craig says in a quiet voice.

My heart clenches at his name, but I push it aside. What Craig just said makes me lean back and look at him closely. I wait a few seconds until Pooh walks off before squeezing Craig’s hand.

“You knew he was leaving,” I state, not ask.

“Yeah, but I haven’t told anyone. I heard things and asked him. He said he trusted me, so I’m not saying a word.”

“He does trust you, and you’re a great friend. I’m glad you’re mine too,” I say.