Page 56 of Vex

“This doesn’t have to seem like a bad thing, Taja. It’s a good thing. We’re together. We’ll be staying that way. With time, we’ll be on solid ground and things with Rooster will end. We can make this work between us. I think this is the result I was hoping for,” I admit to her.

“I think it is for me too,” Taja whispers. “I just don’t know if it’s because I want a baby, your baby or to keep you in my life.”

“Doesn’t matter which, Taja. You’ve got me and our baby no matter what. You might not always think that’s a good thing, but I’ll do my best to make sure it is. I want this more than I realized. Holy fuck, we’re going to be parents. I’m going to be someone’s dad. Oh, fuck me, please don’t be a girl!” I say in a bit of a panic when I realize this could be a baby girl.

“What’s wrong with a girl?” Taja demands to know in a pissy tone.

“I’ll kill any guy that ever looks her direction! If she looks like you, do you have any idea how many men that could be?” I shout back.

Suddenly, Taja dissolves into laughter. She’s leaning against my shoulder and her entire body’s shaking with the giggles. What the fuck? I wasn’t trying to be funny. I’m dead serious about the body count that will occur if we have a girl. This baby has got to be a boy if I have any hope of staying out of prison.

“I can’t wait to ask Axel how he’s going to handle it when Alex is a teenager and boys come sniffing around her! That should make his gossipy little ass disappear for a day or two. What if our baby’s a boy and has the hots for Alex? I can throw that at Axel for months now,” Taja gasps out between bouts of laughter. “With you being such a man-whore, Axel’s going to be scared that your son will be one too. And going to go after his daughter! Axel’s going to have a mental breakdown!”

“Former man-whore, thank you very much!” I inform Taja, irritated with that title even though it’s been well earned.

“That’s yet to be seen.”

“You might not have noticed, but every fucking club member has,” I mutter.

“Whoa! Wait a minute. Axel said something about you acting kind of off for a while and blamed me for it. How am I to blame?”

“First off, don’t listen to much that Axel spouts off about. For Christ sakes, the man has a bird trying to take a hit out on him. I don’t think either of them are mentally stable. But to answer your question, here are some truths you need to know. I wanted you as soon as I spotted you. For a night, for some hot sex and that was it. That’s how I’d always lived and what I thought I still wanted. I knew you weren’t very experienced and that was a huge draw for me. I was born with a dick so that inherently makes me selfish in the respect that I didn’t want to go where a lot of others have been. That was new for me too. I’d never cared about that before. But Suki and Freddy both asked me not to go after you. That you’d been through enough, and I was a complication you didn’t need. I agreed and backed off. During that time, we became more than just co-workers. We became friends and I got to know you as a person instead of just a conquest. I found myself not wanting anything less or easy anymore.”

“Are you saying you quit fucking around way back then?” Taja asks quietly while reaching for my hand.

“I tried to still be a whore but nothing felt right. So, yeah, I quit fucking around and started thinking about what I really wanted. You. I wanted something real. I wanted a relationship not just a night. And every thought came back to you. Maybe a part of me’s happy about the baby because that keeps you in my life too. I don’t know for sure but I am positive that I’m happy as fuck that you’re sitting here with me figuring this shit out together. I have to tell you though that there’s a good chance I’m going to fuck this up. I don’t want to but I might.”

“What if you make a mistake and I call you on it? Will you talk it out or bolt? I’m willing to work with you on any differences we have but not if you’re going to run each time things get rocky. Mom gave Tessie and me stability. She was always there for us regardless of her health issues. No matter how mad, sad, depressed, happy or sick she got, she kept our lives as stable as possible. I’m not saying our lives were easy, but we always knew she loved us, and we’d power through whatever life threw at us together. I need that from you. Especially now, Vex. Shit gets bad, I need to know you’ll be there for me, Tessie and our baby. If you can’t do that, please tell me now,” Taja says.

“No need to worry about that, honey. I’m all in. I’m just sayin’ I’m positive I’ll fuck something up. Call me on it, holler at me—whatever you need to do, but I need you to not bolt too. In my upbringing, when someone didn’t conform to my dad’s ideas, you became a cast-off. A throwaway. I need you to care enough to work through shit with me and not just walk away.”

“What if I tell you I’m not going to let you fuck this up?” Taja asks softly.

“That’d be good,” I say while smiling for the first time in several minutes. Relief hits me and I know in my gut she means it.

Hand in hand, Taja and I walk into the main room of the clubhouse and spot Axel with the twins. In a neon pink baby sling around Axel’s body, is little Alex. We take seats at their table as Mac struts nearby up and down the bar. He’s stopping every few steps to wiggle his tail feathers and bob his head to the beat boxing he’s doing. He’s good, I’ll give him that.

“Who are these lovelies? Taja asks.

“Mia and Zoe. Gunner and Ava’s twins. My nieces and my biggest fans,” Axel replies while making funny faces at the giggling twins.

“Which is which?” Taja questions.

“Fuck if I know. I can never tell them apart. Only Gunner, Trudy and Ava can. And I think Gunner just guesses most of the time,” Axel answers.

Mac stops what he’s doing and lands on the table in front of us in a flurry of feathers. It sets the twins off, and I have to smile at their laughter. They’re beautiful little girls with black hair, green eyes and chubby cheeks.

“Mia!” Mac states while standing in front of one of the twins. He moves to stand in front of the other twin and states, “Zoe!”

“Get out of here, Mac. You don’t know which is which either,” Axel sputters.

“Do too.”

“Move yourself, Mac. I’m teaching the twins to say my name and you’re in the way,” Axel orders. “I want to piss Gunner off and have them learn my name before they can say daddy.”

“Dad’ll be mad!” Mac screeches.

“Say Axel. Uncle Axel. Axxxxel!” Axel says repeatedly to the twins.

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