Page 75 of Magic in My Bones

“You do realize,” Rowan said, their eyes twinkling as they sat next to Cassian, “that this means you're stuck with us now. We don't let family face eldritch horrors alone.”

The word 'family' settled warmly in my chest, a different kind of magic altogether.

As I sipped my tea, I couldn't help but notice the way Rowan’s and Cassian's hands naturally found each other, their fingers intertwining with the ease of long-practiced intimacy. It made my heart ache with a bittersweet longing, my thoughts drifting to Ren.

Rowan, ever perceptive, must have caught the flicker of emotion on my face. “So, tell us about this Ren,” they prodded gently. “He must be quite special if you're willing to face down eldritch horrors for him.”

I felt heat creep up my neck, no doubt turning my ears a fetching shade of crimson. “Ah, well, you see...” I fumbled for words, suddenly feeling like a schoolboy with his first crush rather than a distinguished professor of necromancy.

Cassian snorted, a rare grin spreading across his face. “Oh, you've got it bad, don't you?”

I groaned, sinking further into the armchair. “Is it that obvious?”

“Only to anyone with eyes,” Cassian deadpanned, earning him a playful swat from Rowan.

“There's nothing wrong with having feelings, Dorian,” Rowan said gently. “But I sense there's more troubling you than just a crush.”

I sighed, running a hand through my hair. “Ren is... exceptional. Brilliant, really. His grasp of necromancy is intuitive in a way I've rarely seen. But more than that, he's kind, and funny, and...” I trailed off, searching for the right words. “He makes me feel alive in a way I haven't in years.”

Cassian raised an eyebrow. “Alive, eh? That's a bit ironic for a necromancer, isn't it?”

I couldn't help but chuckle. “I suppose it is. But there's something about Ren that just... lights up a room. Even when he's knee-deep in grimoires about death and decay.”

Rowan leaned forward, their expression softening. “You're in love with him, aren't you?”

The question hung in the air, heavy with implications. I stared into my tea, watching the leaves swirl at the bottom of the cup. “I... yes. I believe I am,” I admitted quietly. “And that terrifies me more than any eldritch horror we might face.”

Cassian snorted. “It should. Love is terrifying.”

Rowan elbowed him gently before turning back to me. “Oh, don't listen to this old grump,” Rowan said, rolling their eyes affectionately at Cassian. “Love is beautiful, Dorian. Scary, yes, but beautiful. Tell me, Dorian, what is it that frightens you most about your feelings for Ren?”

I took a deep breath. “Well, there's the matter of our positions at the academy, of course. The age difference. But more than that, I... I worry about overwhelming him. Ren has been through so much already, and I don't want to add any additional burden to his shoulders.”

Rowan nodded thoughtfully, their fingers absently tracing patterns on Cassian's arm. “It's admirable that you're so concerned about Ren's well-being. But have you considered that your feelings might not be a burden to him at all? That they might, in fact, be a source of strength and support?”

I blinked, caught off guard by the suggestion. “I... I hadn't thought of it that way, I must admit.”

Cassian chuckled, his gruff exterior softening slightly. “For a brilliant necromancer, you can be remarkably dense about matters of the heart, professor.”

My cheeks flushed. “I've made extensive pro/con lists,” I admitted sheepishly. “They weren't particularly helpful, as Ren kept appearing in both columns.” I sighed. “I seemed to find myself just absently doodling his name like some lovesick schoolboy.”

“Dorian,” Rowan continued, their voice taking on a more serious tone. “Dorian, I sense there's something else you're not telling us. Something about Ren that you feel you can't share.”

I sighed, choosing my next words carefully. “Out of respect for Ren’s privacy, there are certain things I can’t discuss openly, even with friends. But it’s that very subject that’s troubling me. I’m not sure how to navigate this… how to approach Ren withoutoverstepping or complicating things for him.” I looked up. “You and Cassian… How do you navigate the complexities of being in a relationship with a man as a non-binary person?”

Rowan smiled faintly and squeezed Cassian’s hand, smiling over at him. “Well, it hasn’t always been perfect, but it’s been real.”

Cassian snorted. “I messed up a lot, especially at the beginning.”

“The key has always been communication,” Rowan continued. “I had to let Cassian know early on that, while I didn’t fit into the traditional boxes, I wasn’t any less of a person, or any less deserving of love. And he had to show me that he saw me—allof me. Not just the label.”

I nodded, absorbing their words. “That sounds… difficult, but also beautiful.”

Rowan leaned in slightly, their voice softening with understanding. “It can be challenging, but it’s also about letting the other person see the parts of you that are vulnerable. There’s no shame in being open about what you need, or in trusting someone to care for all of you.”

Cassian’s eyes softened. “Yeah. And it’s not always about grand gestures, Dorian. Sometimes, it’s just about being there when they need you, without making them feel like they have to explain themselves all the time.”

Rowan nodded in agreement. “Love is in the small things we do for each other. It takes thought and time, and effort, but you learn as you go. With Ren, I imagine it’s the same. He may not always know how to express what he needs, but that doesn’t mean he’s not longing for you to see it, or to offer your support.”

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