Page 20 of The Life We Left Behind

As Delaney stood up, dusting off her jeans, she kept her eyes on the pond like she couldn’t even bear to look at me.

“I didn’t know you still came out here.”

“It’s the first time since…” I couldn’t end that sentence. Couldn’t look back at what could have been not when she was here now, back in my life.

“I have to go,” she hurried out, turning her back as she started to walk away. “This…this isn’t a good idea.”

It felt like she was taking my heart with her. The panic flared to life inside me at her slipping through my fingers once more.

I wasn’t ready to lose her again. Not yet. There was so much we needed to talk about.

“Delaney!” I jogged to catch up with her, even though I’d seen her flinch when I called her name. “Please…let me see you again. We should talk.”

I had to make her understand. If she’d just give me a chance to talk, to explain. I knew she’d felt it a moment ago. Felt everything just how it used to be. We could have that back. We could try again. I just needed to persuade her to give me a chance.

“I don’t know.” She hesitated. Her eyes cut to me as I kept pace at her side, but I knew her nearly as well as I knew myself. She was considering it.

If I was a better man, I probably would have let her walk away. She had a life somewhere. One she’d built without me. I couldn’t bear for her to walk back into it until she’d at least heard me out.

“Please, Delaney. It doesn’t have to be now. When you’re ready. But please. Please let me have a chance to talk to you before you leave again. There’s so much I want to say.”

Her shoulders tensed, and for a moment, I thought she was going to deny me. It wouldn’t matter. I’d find another way. Butthen she sighed, and that one little sound filled my heart with hope.

“I’ll be in town for a while to arrange the funeral. I can try to make time.”

I pulled my business card from my jacket pocket immediately, feeling like an idiot as I handed it to her, but I didn’t have the same number as I did back then, and I couldn’t let there be even the smallest possibility that she wouldn’t get in touch.

As she reached out to take it, I held firm, part of me not wanting to let this moment end. “Please call me, Laney. Please…just…I know I don’t deserve this but…”

But what? I had no excuses for myself. No reason to give her other than knowing she was my only chance at happiness. That she was the best thing that had ever happened to me, and I let her slip away. There was so much that I should have done differently, and as all the excuses filled my mind, I recognized them for what they were…selfishness.

My shoulders dipped as I finally released the card, and she silently slipped it into her pocket. She didn’t say anything as she turned and walked away back to her old house, and I stood there watching her every step. I didn’t deserve her forgiveness or her presence in my life, but that didn’t mean I wasn’t going to fight for it.

Delaney James was back in Willowbrook.

And I didn’t know if I’d survive her leaving me again.

CHAPTER EIGHT

DELANEY

Even as I walked through town the next day, I was still in shock from seeing Trace the day before. And atourpond, of all places.

Of course, it had been inevitable that we’d run into each other at some point. I’d been so worried about it happening that I didn’t even stop to think aboutwhatwould happen. Curling up in his arms while I cried over the loss of my father was something I definitely wouldn’t have guessed.

My cheeks heated at just the thought of it. Out of every single person in town, it had to be Trace that I’d lost my composure in front of.

What must he think of me?

I hadn’t expected him to want to speak to me again, though. Perhaps he just wanted to make sure that I wasn’t going to expose him for what he’d done. After all, I might have signed the paperwork, but I think we all knew it wouldn’t stand up in court for even a second. I’d been sixteen years old, for crying out loud, not to mention the fact that his mother had basically coerced me into signing them.

Surprisingly, even though I was absolutely mortified about crying all over him, I hadn’t felt the anger I’d thought I would. Ten years was a long time, and we’d both changed a lot. I hadn’t really had a choice but to grow up. And now, I wouldn’t have changed anything. I loved my son and the life we had together.

Trace and I were just kids. It was better that we found out then that we weren’t as meant to be as our teenage hearts had thought. Yes, at the time, it had been the worst thing that ever happened to me. He blew up my entire life, and it had taken a lot for me to get over it and build a new life for myself.

But out of it all, I’d gotten Cade, and I could never regret that. That kid was the best thing I’d ever done, and even though it had been hard in the beginning, I’d found true happiness with my son and the family we pulled around us. I had regrets, but show me a single person on the planet who didn’t have them, and I’d call them a liar. Yet, we had a good life.

Maybe it was time to put it all behind me. When I set aside the feelings of teenage me and just looked at this now as the adult I’d become, there genuinely were no hard feelings toward Trace. He might not have wanted a child, but being a mother was the best thing that had ever happened to me.

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