Page 108 of The Life We Left Behind

“Does he ever get tired?” I asked as we watched him grab a stick like it was the greatest treasure in the world and turn to wave it at us before he ran off again.

“I think they continue at this pace until they hit their thirteenth birthday, and then they refuse to leave their room and hate you for the next four years,” Delaney joked.

I shuddered at the thought.

Delaney dropped my hand as she moved to one of the trees, grabbing one of the lower branches and checking the leaves.

“What are you doing?”

“Checking to see if we have any pests we’re going to need to deal with.” She dusted her hands together as she stepped back and then looked down the rows of trees. “How many trees do you think we have out here?”

I looked around the old orchard, counting the rows, and then shrugged. “Probably around sixty.” When I looked back ather, I could see she was running through a list in her mind. I’d missed this about Delaney. She always could get so locked in on a project that there was no other option but for it to turn out perfect in the end. There’d be no scenario she wouldn’t have planned out. She made the best lab partner in school and our whole class knew it.

“Fancy cluing me in on what you’re thinking?” I reached for her hand, and we started walking again, following along in Cade’s wake.

We should get him a dog. That was what was missing from this picture. And I bet he’d never been allowed to have a pet before because they lived in an apartment.

“It might be a bit crazy,” Delaney warned me like she thought I was going to laugh at her. “I’ve been thinking about what I want to do. Honestly, that’s been the last year of my life, figuring out what I want to do. I knew I wanted a business I could build. Something that was my own. And since we came back home, I’ve been thinking about what I used to love doing and, well, I want to make cider. I know it’s strange. But I have so many memories…Why are you looking at me like that?”

“I think that’s an incredible idea,” I said honestly. “Are you thinking boutique label, or do you want to expand into something?”

“Boutique to start with. We don’t have the space or the setup to run much of anything else for the next five years. As it is, I’d need to find a lot of local growers to source the fruit. Sixty trees aren’t really going to cut it, and that’s dependent on there not being any that need taking out. It’s been a long time since anyone has really managed the orchard.”

She looked around, and I could already see her plans starting to grow. If anyone could do this, it would be Delaney. And I could still remember the hard cider we used to steal out of thebarn when we were teenagers. If Delaney was making anything even close to that, she’d sell out every batch she made easily.

This had been such a massive part of our lives back then. Delaney’s favorite thing to do with her dad was to work away in the barn on their next batch of cider. He never sold it. It was just something they did together. Although there were more than a few people around Willowbrook who’d got a free supply for parties and weddings.

I could still remember how we used to run around the barn. Delaney checked on the press and other equipment that seemed so much like mad science experiments to me back then. I’d always wanted to know how they did it. What the trick was to making the James Cider that no one in town had ever been able to replicate.

I stopped suddenly in my tracks, pointing an accusing finger at her. “Youdoknow what the special ingredient was,” I accused, remembering back to when we were kids. “You said he never told you.”

“Of course, I know the secret ingredient,” she laughed. “I was the one who discovered it.”

I shook my head in faux disappointment. “The lies, Delaney. I can’t believe our entire childhood was built on this foundation of lies.”

Delaney wrapped her arm around my waist, nestling in against my side as her hand slipped up the back of my jacket. “Maybe if you make it worth my while, I’ll tell you all my secrets,” she teased.

“Oh, you have no idea what you’re in for. Brace yourself. You’re going to be spilling all your secrets to me after tonight.”

She flushed that delicious shade of pink that made me want to kiss her, and I pulled her in close beneath one of the apple trees.

“I don’t know if I can wait until tonight,” I admitted as I ducked down to kiss the soft skin of her neck.

I felt Delaney shiver beneath my hands, and I slipped my hands under her shirt, rubbing my thumbs against her soft skin.

“Trace! Come see this,” Cade called out, and my forehead dropped to Delaney’s.

“Coming,” I shouted back, and Delaney grinned.

“The joys of having a kid,” she said wryly.

I could see why it might get old, but honestly, the fact that Cade had obviously found something and the first person he wanted to share it with was me meant more than I could ever express. There was only one thing that could beat it, and I just had to hope that one day he’d feel ready to say it. I could wait. Cade was one of the most important people in the world to me.

He was so perfect and so innocent. Yet he’d suffered because of my family, because of the actions of one person. He might not have been in pain, and he had a devoted, loving mother at his side. I couldn’t even argue that he’d wanted for anything.

But he didn’t have me.

And I hoped like hell that it meant something, which I was pretty sure made me a terrible person and an even worse father. Because who thought that way? Who wanted their kid to have known there was something missing in their life just to make themselves feel better?

---