Page 4 of Moth to a Flame

The words, though. The motherfucking words of owning her so completely.

White spurts of cum jut out of the tip of my cock and make a mess of my hand, of my abdomen.

I should be in her apartment, making a mess of her instead.

“No, you shouldn’t,” I tell myself.

One last glance over Regan, and I cut the feed. Wiping myself with the tissue I pluck from its box on the heavy wood coffee table, I curse myself for giving in to my obsession.

“You don’t want her anywhere near you. You know why?”

What kind of question is that? Of course you fucking know. My dead father’s voice thunders in my head.Why are you doing this to yourself? To her?

Haven’t heard from him in a while. Fourteen years, to be exact.

Fourteen years that I’ve kept my shit together.

Now that I’ve snapped, I don’t think I can go back to the way I was. I need her. Have to have her.

She shouldn’t be mine, but she is.

What the fuck is this? You calling her yours? Fantasizing about breeding her? You want to end up like your mother, is that it? You want Regan to end up like me?

“Shut up.” I wave my hand in front of my face, tuck myself in, zip up, and throw my black sweater on. Unable to stay seated, I start pacing the marble floors, convincing myself of the lie I’ve been chanting for the last two weeks. “I’m not her. I won’t kill Regan. I’m obsessed, not irrational.”

The chill of the end of the summer creeps into the house. Closed windows and brick walls don’t fully protect me from the elements. There’s a heating system, sure. It works, too. I’ll be comfortable if I switch it on.

I might grow attached to this place.

You are her son, after all.

“I’m yours too, fucker. Or do you have any doubts?”

Never.

He’s got that right. Axton Sterling knew as much as I do now that his wife, Abigail, would never cheat on him. She loved him too much.

That was the root of the problem, wasn’t it?

Her love.

Her obsession.

Ping, ping, ping.

The notification thrusts me back into my reality.

This isn’t just any other notification. I assigned this specific sound to alert me when someone messagesher.

The second man I allowed to contact her. I messed with our interface two weeks ago, keeping her profile private.

Last week, I set her up with Clayton Sims. He looked at her profile for an hour according to my data, then blocked her. He must’ve jerked off to her before he ghosted her.

Jerked off to my Regan.

Not like they could’ve ever been together.

He ticked off the masochist box. She ticked off the rape fantasy and consent non-consent ones. They didn’t stand a chance.