Page 232 of Quinlan

“That’s it?” I trust that she’s not lying to me. That she’s believed me just because, without explanations or sob stories. Christ, do I trust her. It also feels too good to be true. After being dismissed by the authorities so many times, this is too fucking good. “Me, hiding my abdomen? That’s all you needed to just”—I snap my fingers—“go after Rex? Your half-brother?”

“I. Believed. You.” There they are. These words. Her mouth saying them. I have to breathe through them. Have to breathe them. “From the very first day, I believed you. You didn’t have to convince me of anything. You didn’t have to show me this…” Her voice goes raspy, her teeth gnashing. “This horror that was done to you. Your underlying, never-ending pain was enough. And I fell for that side too. Ibelievedyou. Do you hear me? If not, I’ll repeat it. Today and for the rest of my life. I. Believed. You. I believe you, Damien Black.”

“Ms. Palmer.” The air in the room is filled with her. She’s everywhere, inside my lungs, curled around my heart. Under my skin. “You make it easy to love you. Too goddamn easy. Are you trying to get back at me for fucking with your head? Is that it?”

“I was trying to kill him.” Not her parents. Not the cops who took her parents’ word and that of a weeping child that day in the pool. Kill Rex. For me. “Let’s get out of here. Fuck the old plan. Let’s finish him. Tonight. No one will ever find out. You have the money to cover it up. Please, I—”

“You what?” I release her hair and bend to pick up the knife. Her hand is already open when I shove the handle into it.

Her gray eyes become unfocused. When she’s back looking at me and not into the void, she groans, “I’ll die if we don’t do it. It hurts. The guilt, it hurts.”

“You’ll die when I tell you to.” With her hand in mine, I raise the blade to her eye level. “Which is fucking never.”

“Damien.”

She could ask me anything, and I’d do it. Anything at all, other than go over to Rex unprepared and risk having one of us go to prison. I can’t be separated from her. I can’t rob Laurel and Jagger from this revenge, either. I have to be as miserable as humanly possible until it’s time.

“Tell me you understand.”

“I understand.”

“Good girl.” That flush on her cheeks will never get old. “You want to help me, Quinlan?”

This is the most honest I’ve ever been with anyone. I’m at my rawest, my walls all but gone for her. My heart is as exposed as my scarred abdomen.

“Want to patch me up?”

“I want to kill—”

My thumb brushes her jawline, preparing her for what’s next. “Cut me.”

It feels like silence detonates in the room.

Minutes tick by, and then, “I think I misheard you, Damien.”

“No, you heard me right.” My lungs expand. My eyes move to the knife and back to her. “Cut me. Wound me. Slice through every scar. Every inch. Do it for me. Put me back together.”

“No. No. Fuck you. Fuckyoufor asking me this.” She’s fighting my grip, trying to get rid of the knife. The anger tumbles out of her, too fast for me to stop. “What the—is this a test? One last trial to see if I’m on your side? You don’t trust that I want to kill him, right? That’s what this is. You think I’m lying, that I ranaway for good. Well, fuck you. The answer is no. The answer is—”

“Fuck you, yes. You were clear the first few times, darling.” Even with Rome’s intense training, I’m still stronger than her. The tip of the knife is pointed to the top edge of one of my scars, pressed to it. There are five in total. The rest have faded, thank fuck. “No, this isn’t a test. I have other creative ways to test your loyalty. Don’t need them. You saved me by being born. You could never hurt me, even when you hated me. I believe you just as much as you believe every word that comes out of my mouth.”

Her eyes narrow.

“You had my cock in your mouth, for one.” The corner of my mouth ticks up, though I don’t find anything amusing about this situation. “You could’ve bitten it off.”

She sinks her fingers into my thigh, groaning. “You didn’t fuck my mouth to test me.”

“True. I’m not testing you now.” The sting of the knife on my skin intensifies. I’m the one pushing it closer.

Until she gives in. Until she sees how much I need it.

“You’re going to cut me because I can’t bear having him on me a second longer.” The past isn’t there before my eyes. Quinlan’s here. Angry, beautiful Quinlan. Mine to protect. Mine to have. “You’re going to replace his scars because I need to haveyouthere. I’ve never asked this from anyone. I’m asking this from you, and you’re not going to deny me this. You can’t.”

Any trace of hesitation is wiped off her face. Quinlan pulls her lips in.

“Okay.” The knife goes in. “Okay.”

Pleasure, pain, and righteousness burst inside me. My hand moves to cup the back of her neck, my eyes fixated on hers.

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