Page 145 of Quinlan

My hands release the ties around her wrists. My fingers massage her skin, my eyes searching for abrasions. From this close, I can see everything.

Over the video call, I got hard for her. That’s all it took, a split second of watching her bound, spread and so incredibly sexy. I liked it. Couldn’t get her out of my head.

Binding her was the right call. She needed the reassurances, to feel rather than hear that she was ours for life. She had to be punished for ever thinking it.

It was hot.

It’s not hot at all now that my face is hovering over her sobbing ones and I have her wrist in my hand.

“Liam. Thank you.”

I’m torn. Sliced right down the middle. The pulse raging beneath my fingertips isn’t just hers anymore. It’s mine.

“I’m sorry.” My voice is rough, thick with the panic that I can hardly contain anymore.

Her eyes are wide as she sniffles. “What for?”

I kiss her, moving to stand at the foot of the bed. One ankle after the other. I have to release her before I crumble into dust.

But it’s getting harder to keep moving. My eyes slam shut, my head bows down.

“Liam?” Quinlan’s voice is as soft as her cheeks.

She brings me back. I stroke one freed ankle. Slide my fingers higher, brushing her calf. This isn’t about me. I’ll break down later. In my room. Where she can’t see me like this.

“What for?” Our eyes meet, and my brow furrows. I don’t mean to say what I’m about to say. It comes out of me anyway. “For getting lost inside my head when you needed me.”

She’s quiet, and I take it as a cue. She won’t forgive me tonight. She shouldn’t. Tomorrow, she might. Tomorrow, I’ll be calmer. Be myself again. I always do.

I’ll touch Quinlan, kiss her, fuck her. That other man she talked about, he would’ve begged for her forgiveness. Demanded it.

Not me.

Nothing binds her to the bed anymore. I want to kiss her ankle. I’m devastated by how much I want to kiss it. How I know it’ll put out the fire in my head.

I can’t. I can’t even talk and tell her that I have to leave.

Now that Quinlan’s not bound anymore, my body collapses in on itself. I’m paralyzed all over again.

“Liam. Liam, come here,” she pleads. Quinlan should’ve told me to get lost, and instead she’s pleading. “Please.”

Thispleasesounds different from before. This isn’t alet me go. This isn’t alook at what they’ve done to me. This isn’t evenI’m stuck in the dream where my brother drowns.

Thispleaseis meant for me. Every bone in my body demands I listen to her, that I go to her. Same bones are as heavy and as frozen as my muscles.

“Hey, Liam.”

I look up at her. Climb the bed. Knees between her still spread legs.

“Maybe… Maybe you’ll feel better up here?” Quinlan closes her legs around me. She’s being gentle as she talks me off the ledge. “I didn’t mean to scream. I was scared. I want you here. Please, Liam.”

Get in the fucking closet, kid. I don’t have time for your shit today. My boyfriend’s coming over and you know how much he hates it when you’re in the way. Get. In. The. Fucking. Closet.

Neverplease. Alwaysget in.

Sandy blonde hair instead of a light blonde one. Gray eyes instead of black.

I inhale Quinlan’s scent. That and the way she looks at me push me forward. I crawl up her body, whipping the covers off her. Watch her.

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