Page 19 of Envy

Mary smiles triumphantly. And me? I don’t know if I should be happy or terrified. One monster or the other. Two of Satan’s most powerful demons facing off.

I don’t have to be told to move to the other side and take the seat right next to Garret. I sit, and when I inhale the scent of his cologne, my heart starts to beat like a thousand drums in a parade. He moves his hands from the table to his thighs.

My gaze drops to the back of one of his hands with a skull. The veins disappearing under the edge of the sleeve. His clean fingernails. The black nail polish gone, replaced by a clean manicure.

“Have you seen each other on campus?” Mary asks, but I know why she’s asking.

“It’s obvious I haven’t. I’ve been busy with swimming and…”

“The orgies at those parties you like to throw,” John interrupts. “You’ve heard,” Garret replies, but his gaze is scrutinizing him like darts aiming at a bullseye. “You can come if you want to, John. It might be your kind of party.”

Mary sucks in a breath.

I swallow, staring at the plate in front of me as Georgina comes beside me and places a piece of meat that smells like dirty socks on my plate. John glances at me and then at Garret, measuring the distance between our chairs. Jealousy and possession drip from his scrutiny like a blazing fire. “Oh, Garret, you’re so funny sometimes,” Mary chuckles, trying to play it off like it’s a joke. Garret tilts back his head and laughs, and it strokes my skin like a caress. How can a laugh be so beautiful yet so dangerous? “I’m fucking with you, John,” he says, but I’m not sure John’s convinced. This is the first time I’ve seen John uncomfortable, and it’s almost like he’s terrifiedof Garret. “How’s school and swimming? Any girlfriends?” Mary asks genuinely, her knife and fork cutting into the meat with precision. I think she cares about Garret and what he thinks, but with who she married, I’m not so sure. I wonder what Garret’s father was like. Was he like Garret or John? “I’m beating my time. I think we will go all the way again this year. And her name is Cassie.”

The bitter taste of his lie burns, like embers smoldering beneath my ribs, flaring into something foreign. He lied! My stomach clenches. What type of girlfriend lets her boyfriend stay in the library with his cock out with another girl after he dismisses her? “You have to bring her by so we can meet her,” Mary gushes, as if he just told her he’s getting married. I stare at my plate but feel empty. A waste of space. I don’t even know why they bother letting me dine at the table with them. I’m always sent to my room to eat. I don’t even know which fork goes with what or why the hell this meat looks like human brains. “Rose?” I look up and meet John’s impenetrable gaze. “Eat,” he scolds, like I’m a child. I pick up the smallest fork. “Wrong fork,” Mary snaps. I drop it like I’ve been slapped. “I-I’m sorry,” I stammer, knowing that John will make me pay for it later. “Mary.” But it’s not John scolding her; it’s Garret. “Give her a break.”

“She needs to eat. I’ve told John she needs to see a doctor for her eating disorder. She’s skin and bones.” John stares at her like she revealed a secret, but she goes off, knowing John wouldn’t disrespect Mary in front of Garret. “He’s complained about it before.” John turns his focus on me like he’s just found out I stole his car as she continues her rant. “She’s always had a problem eating since she was little.”

“Isss that sooo,” Garret says, his voice dripping with sarcasm, each syllable stretched out like a rubber band being pulled. His gaze flicks to me like I’m under a spotlight, the heat of his stare sinking into my bones. His hand is on my thigh, and I swear mybreathing stops. “I’ll have to make sure she eats then,” Garret says, like I’m not even in the room. The heat from his hand spreads like smoke between my thighs. He’s so close yet so far. I don’t know if I should shove it away or stand. But then, John will know, and he’ll make sure it won’t happen again. “I give her money for meals, and she’s on the meal plan at school,” John counters.

“The food at school is disgusting,” Garret states. He isn’t wrong. The food looks like it’s about to expire. It’s not meant for the wealthy but for prey. “How much money are you giving her?”

“I beg your pardon?” John says accusingly, like his card was just declined. “Money?” Garret says, as if he’s stupid and hard of hearing. “How much money are you giving her?”

I want to hide under the table.

He could ask me, but Garret knows I won’t tell him, and I’m trying to figure out why he suddenly cares. “Enough,” John bellows harshly.

“Oh honey, she has everything she needs. I know you always wanted a sister or brother, but…”

“You were too busy taking them out of your stomach so you wouldn’t get fat,” Garret interjects, taking a sip of his wine.

Mary places her knife down with a clank. “It’s not my fault I’m fertile. Your father wanted more children and forbade me to be on any contraceptive. I had a son like he wanted.”

“What is so wrong with him wanting more?”

I can feel the anger building, a ten-foot wave wanting to destroy the little fake charade she has going with John. I glance at Garret’s plate. He hasn’t touched the food either. “I’ve had enough of you.” She’s an even bigger monster when she smiles at John as he pours himself another scotch. “John understands. He doesn’t want children. Besides, we have Rose.”

I want to gag. She’s delusional.

Garret throws his napkin onto the meat, the blood bleeding through the white linen. “I gotta go.”

“Already?” Mary cries. “But…you just got here.”

“I’ve been here for the past hour, Mary.”

“But you haven’t eaten your food,” she whines.

“It looks like shit.”

“It’s liver,” she explains as if it’s a delicacy. “And I’m sure it tastes like shit,” he replies dryly. “It is why Rose hasn’t touched hers, and I don’t blame her.” The chair screams when he pushes it back to stand. “I’ll drop off Rose.”

Why is he defending me?

“That’s unnecessary,” John argues, placing his scotch glass on the wood with a thud. “I don’t think you have a choice,” Garret replies scathingly.

Mary glances between John and Garret with wide eyes.

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